Unfair child support laws
Public Comments (14,822)
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Apr 13th, 2012Someone from Duluth, MN writes:
The formula for child support needs to be removed. How can the mother make substantialy more then the dad, be re married and get that income as well and yet the father has to pay so much in child support that he cannot afford basic living needs as well as support the child that dose live with him. -
Apr 13th, 2012Someone from New York, NY signed.
Apr 12th, 2012Someone from Candor, NC writes:
There are people who care about and support their children who are treated less than criminals because of a separation with their drug addicted significant other. One quarter of my pay goes to taxes, one quarter goes to child support. How many of you can live off of half of your paycheck? But I'm sure the mother of my children will have a terrific blowout with the money!REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 12th, 2012Someone from Birmingham, AL writes:
I am single dad going through this now. My ex doesnt even pay taxes because she gets paid under the table and only works a few hours a week. She makes more money then me yet Im looseing my house and behind on everything trying to pay her. My child support money doesnt even go to my child it goes to dates for my ex and her wanted felony boyfriend to live off of cause he hardly works either. I still have to buy clothes and etc when my child is with me and thats not that often because my ex wont allow it. The system is SERIOUSLY screwd up and something needs to be done about it!!!!!REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 12th, 2012Someone from Brooklyn, NY writes:
And I also think it's unfair that the custodial parent is not obligated to report child support payments as an income and the non-custodial parent is not allowed to claim child support payments on their income tax. The child support obligated payments of the non-custodial parent is not calculated fairly, for example the expenses for a child on a month to month basis is not always the same. Clothing should not be calculated on a month to month basis. No parent purchase clothing on a month to month basis for a child. The non-custodial parent is treated as if they committed a crime when a divorce takes place. It just so happens a single parent has to be the custodial parent, not that the other is a low life or incapable. It may just be a mutual agreement between both parents as to who will be the custodial parent to prevent separation of the children and avoid subjecting the children t a long and emotional court battle. You have hard working parents working to make sure they make their payments every month, but the courts never really account for the day to day living of the custodial parent. They also have to be able to pay their bills and meet their day to day obligations. My point is that the law need to be more sensitive to both parts and that they should not treat the non-custodial parent as being a low life and deprive them of their happiness, while the other parent is living with an extra income which they do not have to claim. Very unfair.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 11th, 2012Someone from Gainesville, GA signed.
Apr 11th, 2012Someone from Dahlonega, GA signed.
Apr 11th, 2012Someone from Conway, AR writes:
my husband pays more in child support or 3 children than he brings home. we dont qualify for govt assistance and if i work we cant afford to have his kids when they come. THANKS!!! oh and we are loosing our home.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 11th, 2012Someone from Gainesville, GA writes:
Half the time people are not taken before a judge to see if there will hardship on the parent that has to pay the support,but it is decided by someone in the Dept of human resources and they per-judge the non custodial parent and treat they like they are scum and a monster. I feel that people need to be treated fair and with equal amounts of right.It takes two to make a child so it takes both parent to support not on sitting on its but while the other struggles to support there family. And told that one child is far more important then any other. Parents that get child support should have a job and the child support units need to take in the economic situation of the non custodial parent and have the financial records of the custodial parent and if they are not work but living off someone or the state they need to be required to work job training and have a job and the department of children service be involved to make sure the child is not endangered and has proper care.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 11th, 2012Someone from Breese, IL writes:
And the government wonders why so many children grow up with out fathers, they don't even give them the opportunity.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 11th, 2012Someone from Gainesville, GA signed.
Apr 11th, 2012Someone from Marion, AL writes:
Also, it is quite unfair that when a man continues on with his life and gets remarried and has another child that his new family is treated like second class citizens and are told since the child receiving support was the first family that the expenses associated with the supporting the new family are irrelevant. I mean how is a man supposed to support the wife he is married to, the children in his home, and the child out of his home if the support payment doesn't include information pertaining to expenses for the support of the new family. I mean are we supposed to go without so his ex-wife can receive the majority of his income while I have to work extra hours to cover the parts of our bills that his paycheck shoudl help with. When it comes down to it, he supports his ex-wife and her child and I support him and the rest of our family. This would not be an issue if the money was just enough to support the first child and if the money was actually used for that purpose, but i am tired of my husband buying his ex-wife new vehicles, vacations, and designer clothes while he and I drive our children in vehicles that constantly break down. If these women want to live off of their exes income, they should have stayed with them and made it work. Why does everyone have to suffer?REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 11th, 2012Someone from Dahlonega, GA writes:
A father shouldn't be punished for having a child and to be expected to stop his life to be basically be the only one taking care of the child while the mother sits on her deadbeat a** and not get a job and live off of everybody's tax dollars. she should be accountable as well. why is it in this country discriminates against men? just because a women physically had the child and is a female does not mean shes automatically nurturing and the best care taker. the system should not tell a man he has no rights to be in his child life because hes not legitimated, all that does is tear fathers away from children. i thought the system was for the best interest of the child?! yeah right! i feel like its more about the state making more $$$ off of good people that don't deserve that kind of headache.. that's really sad. there are good fathers out there who would love to be in there child's life but don't have the money to pay you guys and pay child support to remind you to see a child that you proved was already his. i believe if the goverment won't stand behind good dads and make a mother or whatever you want to call it see their children then they shouldn't have to pay child support. i bet that would stop a lot of women having so many babies to make a paycheck to stay at home. the goverment says the need to cut back on money well here's your chance. make it a law one child support is set up and that dna test is given and proves the man the father he automatically gets the same rights as the mother and gets his visitation rights. a man should not be labeled as a deadbeat unless proven unfit. DON'T IGNORE US!!!!!!!!!!!REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 10th, 2012Someone from Portland, OR signed.
Apr 10th, 2012Someone from Salem, MA signed.
Apr 9th, 2012Someone from Shreveport, LA writes:
There are many times that I am in complete agreement with the government and at other times I cannot agree with you on much at all. I wroite to you as a progressive that served a mental health practitioner and long time advocate for CHOICE! Having worked in the field of psychology I have had to approach the unique challenge of providing therapeutic intervention for men whose psychological distress is directly linked to feelings of powerlessness as it relates to experiences in family courts and reproductive decision making. I have stood along side men in the trenches that have defended with great passion our right to "choose". That is... the same men that fight so passionately for our rights have begun to on some level wonder why their voice in the discussion related to reproductive rights not even be heard in the discussion. I must admit that I have begun to evolve on this issue in a way that is more consistent with an old quote made by Karen Decrow of NOW.. "Justice therefore dictates that if a woman makes a unilateral decision to bring pregnancy to term, and the biological father does not, and cannot, share in this decision, he should not be liable for 21 years of support. Or, put another way, autonomous women making independent decisions about their lives should not expect men to finance their choice." -- Karen DeCrow, former NOW President ( National Organization for Women, U.S.A.) In 2007, my nephew (19 at the time) committed suicide after a woman 7 years his senior admitted to pregnancy entrapment (contraception tampering) He was to attend college in the Fall but instead was served with CS orders. Absent the ability to prove in public what this woman admitted to in private my nephew was told to simply "man up" by the courts. After two years of depression his suicide note read... "I cannot believe this has happened. Some days are better than others, but I have decided that I would rather die than to continue to support - - - - . My entire life has been turned upside down and I pray that God recives me with understanding".This has made it very personal for me. What I find most intriguing about the "war on women" is that I keep finding myself as twenty year choice advocate being perplexed by this dicussion. I work in community health. It is hard to ignore the statistics that 70% of our children are born to unwed mothers. Many of the very women for whom I have advocated for years don not even value or exercise the responsibility (use of birth control) that comes with complete control over reproduction pre and post conception. I am personally insulted by the suggestion of a war on women while we as black women continue to enjoy the right to complete control over reproductive decsions while abdicating ourselves of complete resonsibility that comes with it. With 20+ options for preventing pregnancy there is no reason for this statistic to be so high. What is disturbing is that we are marching in the streets regarding the assault onREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 9th, 2012Someone from Valparaiso, IN writes:
There are many times that I am in complete agreement with the government and at other times I cannot agree with you on much at all. I wroite to you as a progressive that served a mental health practitioner and long time advocate for CHOICE! Having worked in the field of psychology I have had to approach the unique challenge of providing therapeutic intervention for men whose psychological distress is directly linked to feelings of powerlessness as it relates to experiences in family courts and reproductive decision making. I have stood along side men in the trenches that have defended with great passion our right to "choose". That is... the same men that fight so passionately for our rights have begun to on some level wonder why their voice in the discussion related to reproductive rights not even be heard in the discussion. I must admit that I have begun to evolve on this issue in a way that is more consistent with an old quote made by Karen Decrow of NOW.. "Justice therefore dictates that if a woman makes a unilateral decision to bring pregnancy to term, and the biological father does not, and cannot, share in this decision, he should not be liable for 21 years of support. Or, put another way, autonomous women making independent decisions about their lives should not expect men to finance their choice." -- Karen DeCrow, former NOW President ( National Organization for Women, U.S.A.) In 2007, my nephew (19 at the time) committed suicide after a woman 7 years his senior admitted to pregnancy entrapment (contraception tampering) He was to attend college in the Fall but instead was served with CS orders. Absent the ability to prove in public what this woman admitted to in private my nephew was told to simply "man up" by the courts. After two years of depression his suicide note read... "I cannot believe this has happened. Some days are better than others, but I have decided that I would rather die than to continue to support - - - - . My entire life has been turned upside down and I pray that God recives me with understanding".This has made it very personal for me. What I find most intriguing about the "war on women" is that I keep finding myself as twenty year choice advocate being perplexed by this dicussion. I work in community health. It is hard to ignore the statistics that 70% of our children are born to unwed mothers. Many of the very women for whom I have advocated for years don not even value or exercise the responsibility (use of birth control) that comes with complete control over reproduction pre and post conception. I am personally insulted by the suggestion of a war on women while we as black women continue to enjoy the right to complete control over reproductive decsions while abdicating ourselves of complete resonsibility that comes with it. With 20+ options for preventing pregnancy there is no reason for this statistic to be so high. What is disturbing is that we are marching in the streets regarding the assault onREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 9th, 2012Someone from Sarasota, FL writes:
With equal right this is all crap. If a man wants to be with his child it is prejudus to say the mother has a stronger connection. If its her chioce and her body, and she can tell the man or not tell the man she is raising the child. It should be completely her respocibilty. Without us men having a say in this that is the only way to go. Can you imagine if they arrested people like this during the depression. Im for equal rights, but the only thing a child needs is healthcare! the rest is school supported by our taxes. Mom can work just like us and get and support herself. Chances are they life with another man anyway. The fact that men like me are ordered to pat 185 a WEEK is BS!!! NO CHILD need that much! If you cant afford a kid dont have themREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 8th, 2012Someone from Gillette, WY signed.
Apr 8th, 2012Someone from Gillette, WY signed.
Apr 6th, 2012Someone from Stuart, FL writes:
My ex-tricked me into marrying her...raised a child that I found out was not mine...she relocated to another state...she has elected not to work...and I have to pay for everything. THIS SYSTEM SUCKS AND IS DESTROYING ME AND MY CHILDREN. PLEASE HELP!!!!REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 6th, 2012Someone from Sophia, NC writes:
i pay child support and owe arrears but father doesnt even workREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 6th, 2012Someone from Topeka, KS signed.
Apr 6th, 2012Someone from Winfield, IA writes:
I have a case where I served over seas in Iraq came home and my sons mother refused to let me see my son she sent letters to Congress men saying I was a bad father and wasn't paying support when it didn't start coming out for another month they want to call fathers dead beats but when the system makes you lose everything and you can't afford to take care of your payments who made deadbeats child support I think the whole system needs revised its sexiest and only for the motherREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 5th, 2012Someone from Cottage Grove, WI writes:
I see both sides to this fight. I am a mother who is owed arrears for child support. They intercepted his tax return from his state of $600. It paid $265 for disbursement fees. I received no payment. What happened to the rest? Boyfriend pays $266 a week. He is seasonal and goes into arrears every winter. He was recently told by judge she would not award him even one child as a tax dependent because he is in arrears. He has no choice but to go into arrears. All mom has to do is start crying and telling lies!! She wins. The courts are bias and do not take in proper accounting. By the time you add interest, taxes paid on the money she receives, he is well over 25%. He was intercepted on March 23rd and she still has not received her payment. What kind of system is this? A condition for shared placement is parents must get along. Ya right she would never let that happen. She has a boyfriend that she supports because he doesn't work. System in corrupt. Ten contempt charges against her for interfering with visitation. He would have to take her to court every other week. It has now been a year and his children have not come to visit. He would have to take off work to go back to court for them to just tell her naughty naughty. He is totally now alienated from his children. Oh they did give him a Birthday gift. A framed picture that says Dad has our pictures where his money used to be. Thanks family court!REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 5th, 2012Someone from Dallas, TX signed.
Apr 4th, 2012Someone from Greenville, SC writes:
with tax returns and bank statements in hand the judge imputed income at twice the actual amount,as she stated"because I have a college degree " I should be able to earn more.Note: paid for college working in the same job field as I do now.have been self employed entire life. No experience working under anyone else's supervision.At 54 years of age I am instructed to find a job that will support $ 732 month payment to the state(not tax deductible)I estimate that =$936 per month) I am a Handyman by trade.unlicensed,uninsured and not bonded.Have steady flow of clients because I practice ALL trades.This will change soon,no driver license,auto registration or auto insurance due to not being able to pay child support will change things. USA, the most legally corrupt nation in the world.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 3rd, 2012Someone from Hayfield, MN signed.
Apr 3rd, 2012Someone from Youngsville, NC signed.
Apr 3rd, 2012Someone from Youngsville, NC writes:
My husbands ex cheated on him and up and left him with his 4 yr old at the time while she went around and lived it up. Two boyfriends later she moves in with her 2nd victim. She then begs my husband to get to see her daughter more frequently, every other week. Which, he gave her the benefit of the doubt, for his daughters sake. She then cheated on this boyfriend and moved in with victim # 3. Whil with victim # 3 she suggests that her daughter get counseling bc of the divorce(later we find it was to build a case) He then gets papers served for custody. He hires a lawyer for $3900 (not a retainer, just straight up to hire) later finds out in order to fight for full custody against a mother he would need around $10,000-$30,000 and may not win. After he spoke to his pastor and several others he realized that if he did that not only may he not win, but that it sets him up to be financially unstable to have his daughter. So he gets her to agree in mediation to go joint custody and he splits all costs with her. This goes on for a year and then she marries the victim she was with and divorces 6 months later from guess what? Yup infidelity once again. She refused to give his engagement ring because the court considers it a gift. So she tells him if he pays for her gas and oil changes for an entire year( he owned a gas station) she will give it back. Which he did because he spent a fortune on the ring. Well here we are 1 year later and he just pumped her last tank 2 weeks ago and guess who is going back to court for CS? Yes, the 1st total calculated was $1030 a month (he nets $2400 a month sometimes less. The second figure was $986 my husband told the court he cannot pay that. To revaluate what he makes, their last amount was $835. He then said I need a lawyer, they said we will not provide one for you. Get one yourself. He then desperately begs his ex and tells her he cannot pay that amount and said the lowest she will go is $700 a month. Court is in 7 business days, She didnt give him a new figure till today, now we have to hire a lawwyer for God only knows, then pay $300+ for court costs even though she ordered the modification, we have to pay her application fee on top of that. Talk about unfair!!! They need to evaluate both homes and parents at the time of the divorce. There should be mandatory counseling of 6 months to prevent divorce is adultery is not an issue. They should also do mandatory ccounseling to teach the parents how to co-parent in these situations. They then need to have a system where ANYTHING that is provided for the child has a receipt and then its split in half or do a standard calucualtion of how much the average cost of a child in that city costs at that age and base it off that. It amazes me that the child support system is a multi billion dollar industry and that they make money off our children. It is sickening and unjust and unfair. So they dont care if the child does not have a home to visit for the dad? Or that he is stableREPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 3rd, 2012Someone from Tampa, FL writes:
I pay $650 monthly for 1 child with little income. His mom recently got my son takening from her by the state because of her DUI. The state is still making me pay while she just gets a free ride. She doesn't have to pay or take care of my son. I have lost everything I had because of the amount they make me pay and can barely feed myself. I asked for a modification because I lost my job and the state refuses to modify it.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 3rd, 2012Someone from Rochester, MN writes:
I am a father of two wonderful children, but I have no rights to them and pay over 1000 dollars in support, I just went to court to reduce do to the fact that I am unable to pay my rent , vehicle payments along with insurence, but i was bullied into agreeing on more support and it was raised, I live off of cereal and sandwiches, they take the support from my full time job and from my Army pay. I am about to get evicted and lose my car because i cant afford to make payments and pay for gas. On the verg of a nervous break down!!!! Something must be changed when the mother makes twice my pay and still wants more.REPORT COMMENTS
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No, CancelApr 2nd, 2012Someone from Rancho Cucamonga, CA signed.
Apr 2nd, 2012Someone from Lawton, OK signed.
Apr 1st, 2012Someone from Pensacola, FL signed.
Mar 31st, 2012Someone from Ashley, ND signed.
Mar 31st, 2012Someone from Albany, NY writes:
CS laws are unfair and should be amended to account for the parenting time and expenses associated with children and not simply who makes more should pay the other parent. I have 50% physical custody of my children, which mean I feed, clothe, entertain, shelter, educate, and care for them as much and equal to their mother. Why should she be paid money from me? I have equal expenses. Because I work harder/earn more, I am penalized. Also, who determined the percentage of CS anyway. This also needs a major overhaul. Women have wanted to be treated equally for decades but I haven't heard of one who has refused child support. So much for equality...REPORT COMMENTS
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