Unfair child support laws

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Some recent comments: these messages are published with permission of the signer.

It seems to be a win win for cheating spouses, who not only take most of your hard earned income, bit also keep your children from you without consequence. Yet i can face jail time, and have my passport revoked. So not only does it pay for being a cheat, and a liar, it is rewarded. The new version of indentured servitude. What happened to the women's movement for which they claimed to be equal? Anyway.
One "woman" has 3 kids ..... each child has a different father... only one father is on child support.. happens to be me. ...but why is she not required to sign up the second child's father for child support. And why does the government not ask about the new third father salary that lives with her? Taxpayers are now involved in raising children cause their mothers can't. ?
Women should be accountable that the money is being used for the child. These laws need to be changed..
State of MA is redic. The woman I was seeing became pregnant and decided to keep the child knowing that I did not want a child or be part of any custody. She now gets an additional 24k annually directly out of my paycheck. Something has to be done.
My fiance(a medically retired amputee veteran) is going to have to pay a third of the money we get each month to his ex for their child who we moved across the country to be near. She has no job and because of that we pay more than if she did. Currently, without any child support factored in, we can not afford to support our lives with our 9 month old son. She will get to sit around doing nothing while we are working our butts off just to survive.
This needs to be a new requirement. Many women do this, not all. There is many good mothers and fathers out there. I am personally tired of paying for my kids mother to sit and not work. I have no problem supporting my child, but there needs to be a requirement for the other parent, mother or father to also work.
I do it all on my own and have been since my kids were born and that will never change. l took full custody of my kids because of unfit fathers ....SINGLE MOM RIGHT HERE
There are great fathers in the world but the system doesn't give them any opportunity. Don't let a few bad fathers ruin it for the great fathers. Each parent should contribute to their child's needs. Fathers should not have to take care of the mother & all Her financial burdens because she decides not to work. Taking so much of the father's earnings leaving them with so little to care for themselves or other children. There has to be a better & fair way for all!
What an awful shame. As a mother with an active father in my children lives, irregardless of our relationship, this is sad to read. Both parents should provide support. Usually women go after child support due to how the man personally treated her. I believe that if there an agreement and the man is providing don't be so quick to put him on papers. Your the parent as well what portion are you providing?
My name is Robert Rucker, born in Illinois, raised in New Orleans, and now resides here in Milwaukee Wisconsin. This has been a place I've been proud to call home for almost fifteen years because of the limitless opportunities that exist here that didn't exist for young minorities in New Orleans Louisiana. I didn't have the best upbringing but my mother showed me how to be responsible. My mother was a single parent and struggled to take care of her three sons alone while my father left us to party out in the streets of New Orleans. I did well academically and always exceed the bar within my education.
While attending Pierre A. Capdau middle school in New Orleans I excelled far beyond what was expected of young black male at that time. I was accepted into Benjamin Franklin high school which was a difficult task to get into but I worked very hard because I had a strong supportive mother who made sure that I stayed focused on my education. I always vowed that I’d never take my children for granted if ever given the chance to have experienced parenthood. I've watch my mother work hard to provide for us and that is an experience that I’d never forget. She wanted the best for her children and now that I have a child of my own I want what is best for my child.
Since day one of my child's life I've always been an active father. She was the most precious gift that I could ever ask for. I was only 17 and a senior in high school when she came into our existence, even though I was young I wasn't afraid of taking care of my responsibility. I had everything all planned for our future. Her mom and I finished high school and soon afterwards she left me for someone else. I was devastated and confused. I couldn't believe that my child's mother wanted to end everything that we tried to build together so quickly. I was a young man working two jobs to support my family and all of that was not enough for her to want to stay and build our family together.
I tried for a year and a half to save our relationship because I didn't believe in giving up on my family. I didn't want my child growing up in a household without her father. Temptation was enough to take over my child's mother mind, and was enough to give up her family completely. We've never been cordial since my daughter was six months old; it took for her to have another child for me to finally have enough strength to move on with my life. Even during the pregnancy of her other child she lied to me claiming that this child was indeed mine also. The day she gave birth is when I found out he was not my child. The person that she left me for was sitting next to her bedside.

Even with us not being together I vowed to always be there for my child. As I moved forward with my life post my child’s mother I started to date again and that helped my self esteem. After the break up my heart was broken into a million pieces and every day that wen
My ex is currently working the system to the max, purposely working less than 30 hours a week to slip under the benefits radar and keep her income at such a level that she gets more child support, food stamps, daycare assistance, medical, etc. She is cheating her boss by taking under the table "bonuses" and doesn't show for work for a week or two afterwards. She is a licensed barber, insurance agent and realtor who claims to only make $15K a year. The judge doesn't want to speculate projected income - thanks, so let's just teach her that she can keep stealing from everyone. Is this really in the best interest of the children?? They now have a mother they are learning to do this from which potentially creates a new generation of this. I'm all for paying for child support when it's truly needed, but not for a deadbeat mother who wants to be lazy. This system needs some fine tuning or an overhaul. At least check into these things because this has been happening for decades. I've not missed 1 payment since I was ordered and will continue to pay, but I feel cheated and taken advantage of and worse, I feel like I'm the only one really caring for these children while their mother gets to party with their child support.
The horrors that are created by a lopsided system in New York State are unbelievable. I made the mistake of withholding child support because my ex-wife wouldn’t let me see my child for several years and fell $13500 in the hole. I found out the hard way that New York State doesn’t care if I see my child or not and this was no reason to not pay child support and they put me in jail.
Since then I have had child support and a specified amount taken out of my paycheck, about 17 years worth. All to the tune of: current on child support, all arrears paid, even $3800 dollars in interest paid. According to the latest statement I still owe $12638 in interest that is compound upon interest.
In the last 6 years I have been sent to jail, had my cars taken, license taken, all while working and paying the support obligation and some towards the arrears. The only interruptions in my obligations were due to job loss. Ironically, these job losses were created by the child support enforcement agency itself. I could be wrong, but this seems a little counterproductive to me. My only crime here is not being able to reach in my back pocket and produce $12638 to stop the madness.
My life isn’t glamorous. I live in a trailer from 1984, drive a 1995 Subaru, and try to raise a family of four on $20000 after taxes and child support obligations. For this, I work 65 to 75 hours a week with an hour drive on each end. I have 0 chance of retirement, 0 chance of ever getting a decent job (background checks), 0 chance of getting a business loan. This isn’t because I didn’t pay, it’s because I didn’t pay fast enough.
This wouldn’t bother me as much if my relationship with my daughter was better. My Ex-wife wouldn’t let me see my child until she was 13 years old. The courts never did anything about the non visitation and by the time I was allowed to see her, her opinion of me had been made; as she told me “You are nothing but a looser that jumps from job to job so you don’t have to pay your child support”. Gee, I wonder where she got that idea.
This is what I don’t understand. I am penalized, forced to comply, charged interest daily, for withholding child support. She couldn’t be bothered to show up for the custody or visitation hearings, blatantly violates my 4th amendment rights by not letting me see my child; and nothing is EVER done. I never will be able put a value on what she was able to take from me, nor will there EVER an attempt to repay me for it with interest and penalties. How this is in the best interest of the child as well as just and fair for both parties involved will always baffle me.
Men are being taken advantage of !!!!
The system is biased towards the mother and encourages dependency. I say this as a liberal, and as both an ex-wife with shared custody (through agreement, not court actions) and a step-mom stuck watching my stepdaughters being used as pawns. Children should not be used as paychecks. In most cases, BOTH people responsible for making them should be required to hold down jobs and, if both are willing and capable parents, they should share 50/50 parenting time, with child support eliminated all together. There are great fathers who want to BE fathers with shared custody, but the institutional biases prevent it. Children need and want both parents. This is what's in the children's best interest.
I do not personally pay child support but know many who are truly being worked by a very outdated and unfair system.
My biggest concern with child support, especially I'm the State of PA is this, if you are more successful than someone you have a child with you end up owing them money even if the minor child is split 50/50. How is that system fair? Is the American dream that people who have more drive and initiative pay the price when they both have equal share or raising and providing for the minor child. At the end of the day it would lower the amount of conflict with the parents, which in turn is most likely in the best interest of the child, isn't that's what important.
I also think! It took both the woman and the man to decide they wanted to have sex, and knowing the possibility of creating a child threw their actions, I think the responsibilities' of raising the child or children should fall on both the man and the woman, and that after the youngest child has started school. I also would support any bill that would get those women that collect "child support" out of the house and back to work, to help support the life and or life's they helped create.
I just completed my online bankruptcy class so I can file Chapter 7 bankruptcy this week. I never thought I would be here. The Divorce has completely wrecked my financial situation and the unjust child support laws have made the situation dire. I have a college degree, a career in middle management, and here I am broke, living pay check to pay check, and hoping I can keep the lights on. My ex wife on the other hand is a waitress, takes frequent vacations, and just bought a new car. I love my children dearly, they are my life, however when the child support amount I pay covers every single bill my ex wife has, including her new car and vacations, then there clearly is a problem with the system that is in place. I believe in a fair, equitable child support law that is balanced. Currently that is simply not the case. I remain positive that if enough people speak out, maybe, just maybe, there will be change.
I have been living below standards almost homeless twice. But I never get behind on child support. And I have owned two corporations that the state gave to my 2 x wives I'm treated like a criminal by the Oklahoma Child Support office. No compassion from the courts or (judge) who plays god with my life maybe if his*****was homeless he would have a different outlook. Oh. BTW. I make $17 hr. And have a avionics degree. (I'm not a dead beat stoner) and live day to day. ( I have no toys (boats cars ect) I live a simple life. And don't know how I'm going to make it. **** the governmen
I have no problem paying child support for my children. I also go above & beyond buying clothes, paying for sports activities, camps, tutoring, etc...The problem I do have is my children are 10 & 12 years which gives their mother full ability to work at least part time. I work 10-12 hour days paying child support while my ex sleeps half the day, naps & has TV marathons in the evening! She is now taking me back to raise child support even higher. How is it fair that by law I fully support my children while my exwife doesn't contribute a penny?? The law definitely needs to be changed! It creates so much animosity in an already difficult situation. How is this healthy for the children??
It's a shame what I have to go to the females are always getting favorited no matter what the situation is its a shame, I get threatened day in and day out about child support and wanting more whatever the case may be its a shame that this country allows such a corrupt system something needs to change one child does not need 500 dollars from a parent they already see 2/3 days a week plus has a another parent it's ridiculous I'm basically getting my hard earned money ripped from me because my ex cant be as successful as me and then all you hear is dead beat dad this and that females all want money money money!!!!!! Also when I first got my child support set up I was told to bring all this information in , bills ect, we walked in and all the lady did was look at my exs paperwork and just act like life is so hard for her and didn't even acknowledge my bills or things I have to pay for or anything and its a compete shame... Something needs to be done this system needs to be managed way better and the pie needs to be fair not just cutting it so the make race gets screwed everyone should have their child support re done its a shame that this country is 1 sided these people should feel terrible for how we get treated!!!!
I was put on child support recently. The judge never looked at my expenses or f income. I was asked my salary verbally. Then a monthly payment of $645 was imposed on to my cost of living. I have to move out and possibly back home with my parents at 34 years old. The sad part is that i have been in less communication with my child since the court dates. I was a active part in his life, but his mother wanted more!! I bought hom his Iphone since age 7 so he call and text me. This was going great with weekend visit at his home for years. Until his mother wanted to pull him out of school for a cruise!! I objected and refused! Now i am facing child support for $1245 monthly while she has a income of $38k yearly and lives at home rent free. I also am yaking care of four other children with no support order in place but i am paying for more for one child then four!!!
I wish the law was really to protect both parties!! Emotional evalutions should be done on both parties prior to proceeding. Because the impact on one persons life based on variables such as family trips, new girlfriends, and miscommunication can effect a person extremely!!! My son is 10years old and child support is now being applied. Tamara Mervilus if you ever get a chance to read this, I hope my hard work pays you more than you need!! God bless fathers!!
I was put on child support recently. The judge never looked at my expenses or f income. I was asked my salary verbally. Then a monthly payment of $645 was imposed on to my cost of living. I have to move out and possibly back home with my parents at 34 years old. The sad part is that i have been in less communication with my child since the court dates. I was a active part in his life, but his mother wanted more!! I bought hom his Iphone since age 7 so he call and text me. This was going great with weekend visit at his home for years. Until his mother wanted to pull him out of school for a cruise!! I objected and refused! Now i am facing child support for $1245 monthly while she has a income of $38k yearly and lives at home rent free. I also am yaking care of four other children with no support order in place but i am paying for more for one child then four!!!
I wish the law was really to protect both parties!! Emotional evalutions should be done on both parties prior to proceeding. Because the impact on one persons life based on variables such as family trips, new girlfriends, and miscommunication can effect a person extremely!!! My son is 10years old and child support is now being applied. Tamara Mervilus if you ever get a chance to read this, I hope my hard work pays you more than you need!! God bless fathers!!
I have 41% timesharing and that alone was a nightmare. My ex just took of with my son and allowed me no contact. Because we live in different counties, I had to petition a different court. Now I pay two child supports for the same child. No one wants to help me, all the court wants is money and child support enforcement is so incompetent the only thing they can do is take your money.
My ex throws the child my way as she doesn't want to take care of him. After I pay all of the child support I owe, I don't have money to even buy diapers. This is an unfairness that a father nor a son should have to endure.
Who are these laws protecting?
Open your eyes and see how this is affecting the people, the fathers who want to be there for their children, but are forced to live like peasants and in fear of becoming delinquent on their child support. Due to not even making enough money to survive.
Children should not have to be a sentence to years of debt and misery - the child support system is CORRUPT and completely unjust in the United States of America. Period. There are plenty of options for children needing support other than crippling a parent's income by the heavy burden of outrageous child support payments. Parents are humans too and if they live with such a burden imagine how that burden rubs of on the child - it's just hurts everyone. Please change child support laws in this country to help save so many parents that are suffering due to unfair child support payments. Let's be the positive change this system DESPERATELY needs.
Child support should based on the needs of the child/children, not on a persons income. But, then again, I am the same person who also doesn't believe that child support money should go to the mother. Set up some sort of fund, and when a need arises, with verification money is allotted for said expense. Otherwise, the money can go towards college, or even to the child at an appropriate age. Children are a supposed to be a blessing, not a burden. And they certainly are not meant to be pawns in the parents screwed up "game of life".
I believe child support should more fair. The court says its about the child, if so why don't take in consideration that the father would have to get an extra job just to survive and spend less time with their children. This is one of the reason why children are going to jail, committing suicide, low self esteem. This is not healthy for our society, its not healthy for America. Some father fall into depression because they can't see their kids as much as they would like.
ex wife walks into a child support office in Alabama, lied on an affidavit about how much I owe her, they took her word for it. I didn't get a an opportunity to contest and now they take more money out on top of support. Why don't men get fair chances to fight anything? I am not trying anything funny but I just want an equal shot when someone lies. I can't afford a lawyer and because I am a hard working guy they take advantage of me. Someone needs to hold these child support agencies accountable for illegitimate practices. All I ask is a fair hearing.
My husbands ex has a history of proven drug and alcohol use. Lies to the court, will not get a job is having up to $3000.00 a month deposited into her checking account, collecting food and cash benefits from the government, asks that all courting filing fees be waived (and each waiver has been granted by the court) and is taking him back to court for the 5th time in seven years....Not only is the court system in the wrong but so is social services for believing this womens lies and not removing the children from the home.
I think it's time to put and end to the dead beat dad law the was signed into the system under Bill Clinton term of office. In my case Oklahoma Child support refuse to accept payments from me while I worked in China and was trying to make the payments. I think the whole child support system needs to be done away with period.
I have 50 % custody. I am involved in everything my son does; including coaching all of his sports. I support him at my house and pay $370 per month because she refuses to get a better job. She has a degree in interior design and chooses to work as a bank teller instead. I pay for her lack of ambition in life and this can't be right.
We need reform now! here is a list of changes we need, NO MORE interest on back pay, how do you expect a father to get fought up if they can't ever catch up?, also, stop taking more money everytime a father gets little raises at work, that's not fair a man can work hard and you take that extra amount he gets for working hard guess what the Gov takes more taxes as well so a father loses everytime with that, you need to have a set payment and leave it alone, there is many more things we need fixed here but that's just a start on important issues, my email is CurtisDavis247@yahoo.com if you live in Oklahoma and would like to talk about the issues and things we can do I'm here, we need to stand up together and FIGHT for rights of Men as Human's, we will no longer take this! We need to go to DHS, to Court houses and rally! Lets do this!
Not all mothers are sitting home living off their ex husband. I definitely agree the laws need to be changed but for anyone to call all women lazy or are taking advantage of the system is just as wrong as it is to call all men deadbeat dads. There are women out there that should be helping to support their children just as much as there are men that should be helping to support to their children . My ex husband hasn't paid support in over 18 months. We have been in court numerous times since October 2013. At every hearing he is threatened with going to jail but nothing ever happens. He has technically been in cotempt at every hearing but he makes up some lie and the judge takes his word. My ex husband was fired from his job in August 2013. He worked for his Uncle's seafood business and was fired for stealing thousands of dollars from the company. My ex husband had admitted to having a drug problem and in October 2013, we had our had our 1st contempt hearing where the judge decided to excuse my ex husband from his responsibility of sharing in the support of his 16 year old son. Since he was trying to get his life together for the 5th time at the age of 40 she placed our support order in a non-financial status which means he was able to obtain employment so therefore wasn't being held responsible for paying support. Now, if my ex husband had been in an accident or had become seriously sick I can understand the non- financial status, but for a grown man who decided to start using drugs in his late 30's doesn't seem fair to my son or myself, especially since my ex husband made the decision to do drugs which led to him being fired from the company. The arrears were up to $7,000 which my ex husband had just paid off his arrears totaling $10,000 through an injury insurance claim intercept. It is now March 2015, my ex husband sti doesn't have a job. He is still using drugs although he has been through rehab twice in the last 18 months. Not only has he not been held responsible the court has forgiven his arrears of $7,000. Our last contempt hearing was on 2/18/2015 and,the judge ordered my ex husband to have a full time job by 3/1/2015 and to call his caseworker no later than 3/1/2015 with his employer's information. However, he didn't have a job and he called on 2/27/2015 to advise the court that he had 2 job interviews the week of 3/2/2015. Again, nothing was done although my ex husband is clearly in contempt since he was ordered to call with his full time jobs employers's information. He wasn't ordered to get a job interview but a full time job. This has been what has happened at every hearing. Meanwhile, I'm trying to get over time as much as I can and unlike my ex husband I do have a didisability that I didn't create for myself. In April 2012 I was diagnosed with narcolepsy. So I really don't understand why my ex husband is receiving $200.00 a month in food stamps and $100.00 a month in cash. I'm now 42 years old, I have a collge degree and I make e
Child support laws are unfair when it comes to having 50/50 custody. I have to pay 100% of the time when my ex is perfectly capable of being self sufficient! If you have 50/50 custody then there shouldn't even be child support paid to the lesser earning parent. There is no incentive for the lesser earning parent to better themselves if they continue to receive $ from the other parent.
My brother is a single dad and the biological mother is $7.000 dollars behind in child support and the Colorado courts do not care. A man would be in jail or have his wages garnished.
My brother is a single dad and the biological mother is $7.000 dollars behind in child support and the Colorado courts do not care. A man would be in jail or have his wages garnished.
My ex wife makes 100k a year while Im scraping by, giving her 1/3 of my total income. Complete ******** system.
My ex wife makes 100k a year while Im scraping by, giving her 1/3 of my total income. Complete ******** system.
how do we fight these laws? who do we contact? what forms need filed! these laws are completely unreasonable, something needs to be done. i just dont know where to start........im a single mother and was once paid child suport and i dont even agree with it ......its unfair, unconstitional....and sad that its been going on this long
I been there for my child from day one. Her mother never learn how to drive and did have a way to work I let them live with me I played ALL the bills in the house and paid ALL My daughters expenses. Plus she said I should have to give her money every pay period because she is a quote " BAD *****". She don't cook, don't clean, and tell me I should be happy i'm not on child support. She recieved a income check purchased Tattoos, hair, took her friend and family to Dave and Busters. Check this I taught her how to drive she left the DMV and went straight to the Dealership and put a down payment on a new car. She said I should pay the monthly payment I said no she put me on child support .They raped me. I have a good job that pays good, but like anybody knows you don't bring home everything you make. Child support goes by you gross income. Im in the process know of losing the house I Invented them to stay in. She stay in a nice income base apartment with pool, workout room, and free laundry room. She also receive food stamp now. And my mother said she on facebook holding a hand full of money poker style, talking bout she just got her refund check. I don't look at it because I might hurt somebody. I Drive a 2004 Toyota Celica I had seven year before I met her. She drive a 2014 acura ilx, she got the day I took her to get her lincense. But she has a miminal wage job. The system is a joke!!!

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