Unfair child support laws

22,481 Letters Sent So Far

After children turn 5 they are in school and those women who collect child support sit at home doing nothing when they could be working part time to help support there children. It use to be the male as the main source of income, not anymore, we live in tough economic times, where it takes two in the household to support children. Why should those women stay at home when they could be working. The law should be added to so that those women don't have several babies and then wait for the child support to come in. They should at least be given some finacial responsibility as well as the father. After there youngest turns 5 they should should be required to work part-time to collect there child support. Nobody should have a free ride.

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We complain about the child support laws but what we really have to do is get involved with getting these laws changed. No one seems to want to step up and do something about them. I am guilty of that because as long as I was working, it didn't really matter. But since I have been unemployed I see the total lack of regard for the non-custodial parents. I plan to not only sign a petition but get on the steps of our law makers to take another look at these laws and make them more fair. They say it's about the children, but I think child support agencies made it more about their bonuses for collecting. Yes we may have had children in previous relationships but these laws care nothing about the noncustodials if they get remarried. These laws must be changed to make living possible for both parents and the children.
I just got ordered to pay $985 per month in child support and that doesnt even take into account the cost of medical insurance I am also paying. So, in short, I pretty much am suppose to hand over half of my take home pay to her and live out of my car while she sits at home and does nothing.
I am about to go through this SAME problem. I was with a girl on and off for awhile when she started talking bout wanting to be serious. At first i did doubt her motives because you hear all the horror stories anymore. Eventually she convinced me she was real and i let her move in and we started to make plans for a real future together. It only lasted about a month... jus long enough to convince me to not wear condoms with her. She ended up leaving me unexpectedly and i found out a couple weeks later she had already moved in with someone else. Time went by and she texted me that she might be pregnant. Without even asking for proof i immediately ask her back and she agrees. Less than a week later she lies to me saying she was invited to a bday party for a friend. A couple hours after leaving she texts me that she had went yo a hospital and gotten checked... something she NEVER even mentioned while with me even tho i offered to take her before and to buy a home test first if she was nervous thinking i was being a concerned and considerate man. After her positive results come back she lets me know and also informs me that she and her new man will be seeking the max penalty for me because i had refused to take care of her and had lied to her which are both very much false. The problem is even knowing that i have done EVERYTHING possible to try i sit here and read on the internet alot lately and read so many cases of this happening all over. FYI i am 100% disabled from a car wreck that resulted in a major spinal injury causing paralysis and permanent nerve damage. Will never work again and am also a single father to a 5 yr old son i have raised by myself since birth because HIS mother walked out on us when he was a month old. Where are the laws that help us men? Most of us want to do the right thing but arent even given the chance. This has to CHANGE
My husband has a 6 year old with his ex and he only pays her $175 a month (which really isn't much). But I feel like it should be taken into consideration that we are married, have two children together, have a home, car, and all the bills that come to take care of all that. Plus my husband has medical, dental and vision insurance on all of us including his 6 year old.
The mother however is 24 and still lives with her parents and sister in a small double wide, works as less as possible, and has NO bills to pay, but yet when we pick the 6 year old up or see her out in public her clothes are old, dingy and either way too big or too small and her shoes are always nasty. We have bought her many new outfits from Justice and a lot of new shoes but the mother will never put them on her!
It isn't fair that we are in need of a new home badly but cant afford it now and especially wont be able to when he is ordered to pay an extra $300 more a month that we honestly don't have!
The problem is, Everyone wants equal rights but nobody wants equal responsibility.
I am currently playing to get married to my fiance we have been dating for a while and I have a child that is not his and he has a child that I didn't carry. His child mom has a very good job and she makes threats all the time if he doesn't do what she tells him to do. Like buy all kinds of Jordans and unnecessary things for their child. She has gotten a new car and if b he does anything to show he is ok financially she wants every bit of it. We are trying to raise kids and keep our household together and we can't because of her greed. I don't understand why the courts allow this. If he is paying his support and decides to move on with someone else and try to make a good life, she is allowed to threaten for an increase. She trys to live a fantasy life and he has to pay for it. She is so great for his money it's sad. I think that this child support thing needs to end as far as giving cash to the parent. They should have to buy clothes and shoes for the children every so often and go half on any extra activities the child may be interested in. Paying over 100 a week is crazy. I have a child of my own and I don't receive support at all, if he decides to do then ok, but if not I still have responsibilities, if help is offered I am sure to take it but he has a life too. His parents help and if I ask they are there. He isn't working but that isn't an excuse for me to slack on my end. It's sad because most woman have babies with guys just to ruin their lives. Yeah you may have moved on but I still have your child and I am putting you up for child support. We can't get have a wedding because she takes everything, if you supposedly can't take care of the child give us custody. These laws need to change, it's not the dads that are deadbeats it more the mothers.
My brother pays child support for two children with two different women. He is completely involved in the life of one little girl. However, the second little girl has a mother who refuses to let him be involved at all, raised her to believe someone else was her daddy and is constantly going on drug binges. She has 5 kids with 5 different men and does not work. She collects child support from each of them, takes unfair advantage of HUD. Because she would rather get free money to do drugs and leave her kids with her parents. If the state is so concerned with making all of the father/s pay child support, WHY are they not concerned with 1- keeping tabs on what mom is up to, where the money is going, and forcing her to keep a job...and 2- not allowing a mom to just decide that dad can't be involved at all, with the exception of child support? It's unfair. How do mothers (or fathers if they are the primary parent) feel that it is okay to take the other parents money each month but not allow the paying parent to play a solid parental role in the childs life? In cases like this, when one parent flat out does not allow the other to be present, child support should not be required. Period.
I pay 140 a week for my oldest daughter's mother to go out to bars and purchase a Lincoln Truck while my wife and i struggle to pay our own bills and the needs of our daughter. My family and i buy my oldest new clothes, shoes, toys, etc because it seems her mother never does. Im not against paying but i feel as though it should go into an account where it can only be used for the child or i shouldn't have to pay the amount i pay now.
My husband pays his ex $560 a month for their 3 year old daughter. He is the sole provider in our family so that I can raise our daughter. We can't even pay our bills!
My daughter is 16 and recently has decided to move in with me rather than her mother.

I had called DSHS to let them know they can stop taking money out of my paychecks for child support. After a few days I had to call them back. At which time they stated that the mother said she was still living with her. Of course I reminded them that we had moved all of her belongings into my home and I had been taking her to school every morning. They then gave me a number to call which was disconnected. Then gave me another number which led me to another person that gave me a new number and a website to go to. After not being able to figure out what else I needed to do I contacted an attorney which of course I cannot afford. They informed me that according to state laws if I move forward with this that the end result is that a judge would award her mother custody and I would continue paying child support. What? She is 16. Anyways I have contacted a few more and am awaiting replies. Funny thing is when we first separated DSHS had know problem making sure the child support was automatically deducted from my paychecks with no prior notice or approval through me. This is solely based on a phone call from the mother. If the State is seriously concerned for the well being of the child then why are they not doing the same for me? Because I am the father? This is really unfair and the only person suffering from this is my daughter. Why is our state so one sided? I thought it was about the child not the sex of the parent. I am totally confused and disappointed. If it cant be resolved I will be forced to send my daughter back to her mother only because the state wants it that way. It feels like I am paying her mother so my daughter can live with me. Why would the state make this so hard for a father? Seems pretty simple to me. I would really appreciate any help you could do for me or even just let this be known to everyone so it can be fixed for future fathers. No one should have to go through this. It is very stressful and sad. I love my children and I do the very best I can. The state should see this and reward fathers not punish them.