Unfair child support laws

16,373 Letters Sent So Far

After children turn 5 they are in school and those women who collect child support sit at home doing nothing when they could be working part time to help support there children. It use to be the male as the main source of income, not anymore, we live in tough economic times, where it takes two in the household to support children. Why should those women stay at home when they could be working. The law should be added to so that those women don't have several babies and then wait for the child support to come in. They should at least be given some finacial responsibility as well as the father. After there youngest turns 5 they should should be required to work part-time to collect there child support. Nobody should have a free ride.

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I am 43 years ol had a daughter when i was 19 in kansas.I paid for her until she was 19 and quit college and got married.As mothers and fathers we know it is our responsibility if we make a chile to support him or her,but and a big but is when we get unemployed and do not recieve unemployment or any kind of income we are jailed and labled deadbeat parents.As in my case I got married and had a son 13 years ago,I love more than anything but do not get to see anymore,at one point I was paying support for him and my gilr until she got married.Anyways back to the true story that is going on now is that I have always paid my support until last year,I worked at walmart only job here in this small town where I live and had to move after my wife got everything from my divorce in WI.I had to quit that job because health reasons with my heart and needed hernia surgey.I have been DR every month over 100k in bills trying get back on my feet so I can work again,I always have sine i was 14 years old had a full time job.Now I am doing better and cant find a job but have sold everything I owned and cashed out my 401k to try and keep with my payments,I am 900 dollars in arrears now and they want me to show cause why I am not paying every month and providing health insurance,which he gets free from his mom geting disability cause she tried kill herself 3 times,thats another story I tried geting custody over that in 2008 and cost me all my savings and she still has custody.My point is they dont try to work with you.I live 900 miles away and have court next month to try and defend myself with 70 cents in the bank and no vehicle and no way to get there,so I will get A FTA and contempt charge plus says that they will charge me 2k a day for each noncompliance.WTF!!!! I am trying get a job and i try make payments when ever I get any kind of money,I eat once a day and live at my mothers who is on social security and cant help,we get lot of our food from food pantry once a month.I use to help her with bills and pay my support when working,now I will be jailed here and extridited to WI to serve time because I am 900 bucks behind all because its a IVD case and the get matched a dollor for every one they collect from me,the whole thing is a scam,woman and fathers that dont get welfare from the state get no help to collect,but the lazy parent geting disabilty and free health care get free lawyers to come after us fathers that are trying our hardest to pay.So looks like I am going get a warrant,so wont be able to apply for jobs now.so hurts my son and family here as I cant help.Oh and the modification is a freaking joke,I tried that took months to even get a call back from it and said I was already paying the lowest at 17% of what i use to make so they cant do anything to lower it.
9 years of anger built up inside of me from this absolutely unjust system of family courts. I can not believe that these legislators have made the policy the way it is. HEY LEGISLATORS! YOUR LAWS PROVIDE INCENTIVE FOR WOMEN TO BECOME PREGNANT, KEEP THE CHILDREN AWAY FROM THERE FATHER, AND COLLECT WINDFALL CHILD SUPPORT AMOUNTS.
I used to see my children every week, several times a week. Now I haven't seen them in 3 years. They are suffering! Why did this happen? Well there mother and I had a tremendous argument in 2009 when I was struggling financially. The state of CA suspended my drivers license for the inability to pay A RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF MONEY to the custodial parent. I begged and pleased with the mother of my children to make them stop. Her, loving control and power, refused to do anything. So I told her I was in despair, and feeling suicidal. I was. Day after day the feeling of hopelessness. I declining economy, no work, yet the jurisdiction and its partner (my children's mother) still demanded an unreasonable amount of money. So she suspended visitation. I went to court to fight for my rights as a father. The courts said ok, now go to mediation. I went there, and guess what: "I fell into a trap". Because I was honest about smoking marijuana in my passed. The mediator said, I fell into a trap, and now I have to prove that Im not a detriment to my children. I said ok. Bring it on. I'll show you through character references, pictures, and their testimony. Oh no, you can forget that path of righteousness and justice. Her is what was recommended: I was court ordered to go see Colleen Moore for a drug evaluation. Called her to make an appointment. $1000!!! Up front. I then tried to sign up for a less expensive option (one of the other options in the court handout, Sierra Counseling). Nope I must be Colleen Moore. NOW I HAVE A HUGE FINANCIAL IMPEDIMENT TO ME SEEING MY KIDS! Since then they were moved to Riverside County, the mother married another man, and I pay that household $1800 month.


Something has to change. Again women are motivated to conceive and then collect.
I have two Children. I am a very involved father, and would love nothing more than to have full custody of my children because they are my world. A Court will grant more money to the moms, who wont get either necessary jobs or refuse to work? It isnt fair, not to mention a father is automatically looked on as a "deadbeat father" almost immediately by the court system, as has been my case. If a parent cannot fully support a child on their own then the parent who wants to do all of that for them should be the one with the custody. I believe a law needs to take affect that will tremendously rattle the Child support arena. perhaps if parents were less likely to recieve a large sum of money, they might abstain from having kids....this could also be a factor for youth pregnancies as well.
These laws are unjust and need to change, I go above and beyond for my kid and have her in my possession 80% of the time since she was born.
The mother knows I am a great dad but wants to
"Get me back" because I'm happy in a new relationship and is using the justice system for revenge purposes. A just country would not allow this to go on, it has to stop for the sake of all good Dads!!!!!!
I'm a 25 year old male, college graduate, have a job that doesn't pay well because I'm fresh out of college, and 33% of my check goes to my daughter's mom. That leaves me with just over 1000 dollars a month to support myself and my daughter. Have you tried living on 1k a month? It's not possible and unfair to my daughter. Her mom stated she pays daycare, so without question or asking to see proof of this, they added 400 dollars a month to daycare which I have to split. Her mom works when I have our daughter during the week, so there is no day care. The system is broken and it is extremely unfair to hard working males and their children.
Men of America unite stop paying until we get fair treatment they cannot throw all of us in jail. they are make a living off our misery
How is it fair that my husband works 6 to 7 days a week, not seeing any of his paycheck, while his ex, whom makes quite a bit more, gets to work 2 days a week & collect off him? His support is already way too much bcuz the judge denied a decrease despite it being based on his previous job with overovertime!!! If that's not bad enough, how is he ordered to pay 27k of her student loan, when his name is nowhere on the loan!?!? Yeah right..she claims she is only trying take care of the kids, but never hardly has them when shes supposed to, & rest of the time they are in school or after school daycare where she still has them even when she isn't working! He had proof that he had already supported his ex the 8 yrs she was in school to get a 4 yr degree but still got stuck with her student loans? So bad that he had to file for bankruptcy, which a lawyer recommended. However, after he filed he found that he was still responsible bcuz a judge ordered it. Therefore, on top of support which already took most his check, the bankruptcy court then took the rest of his check. How does anyone, even a judge, have the right to dictate a man's life & ruin it???? They have way too much power & shdnt be allowed to ruin a man's life because some dads have chosen to be deadbeat dads. & judges aren't God. It makes me sick. How will we have $ to support our kids? The system says they are for the children, but the kids from a 2nd marriage aren't as important?? It needs to change & fast! My husband has lost literally all he had while she got all she asked for..even with proof that he went above & beyond for his kids & paid more than required in past. Lately because he was ordered to pay more than he makes & based on OT from old job, he hasnt been able to pay support for 3 months, & just got a notice he has to go back to court for being late & not paying, with threats he could go to jail. How can a man get a fair shot when he has no $ to afford a lawyer?
It has made me literally sick to my stomach to sit there, feeling helpless to help my husband from these truly unfair laws. My husband was previously married to a woman that has tried to live off him so that she does not have to work. Everything with their divorce and support has gone her way. He has literally lost all he ever had & worked so hard for his entire life. His bank account is always in the negative, he has lost his truck, home he had with her, and his credit is ruined. His support is so high that he cannot afford even the barest of and most basic essentials. He has ask me for gas money just to get to work so all of his check can be taken from him. I have tried help him by getting him a lawyer, but it didn't help in that county. He lost the home because he had given his ex money to pay the house pmt and utilities, but she never paid it and pocketed it instead. By the time he knew about it his house was in foreclosure. He had proof of this and still lost it all. He also had to get a different job where he is making about 10 less than old job, and has still been denied when he tried to get his support lowered, and was told that he would have pay for mediation or a lawyer to go to court to get it decreased and he is not able since he already has no money. The judge ordered him to pay support based on his previous pay rate with overtime!!! We were told it was illegal to base support on OT but the judge would not change it and said it was consistent enough!
While I was married we as a family spent maybe $100-300 per month on our 2 kids. Divorce now she get $1900 per month taking care of her rent/car payment/eating out. etc....and still tries to hit me up for clothes/education....What about my rights? How come the bulk can't go into trust for college, misc stuff the kids needs? They claim the money for getting a car loan but can't claim money on taxes? Why can't I right off the money? A 1980's system that hasn't changed with the times. Oh and it's IL too. Flat percent and all the extras Insurance/daycare is separate.
When a man works overtime to support his family and the court takes that money into account with child support it not only takes away from his responsibility to support his children it also is not guaranteed that he will have overtime the following week or year. This system is screwing the tax paying father who is trying to keep up with hard times. The mother of first child not only gets paid off the book and screws the system any chance she can but gets double of what she did before due to my hard work and overtime to pay my bills. NOT FAIR!