Stop False Allegations of Domestic Violence

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Some recent comments: these messages are published with permission of the signer.

My husband put a shogun in my face and locked me out of the house. I called 911. I got arrested because he said I slapped him. I did not. Meanwhile the cops ignored my complaint , 911 call. What corrupt people
There needs to be better equality in family law.
I understand the need for emergency safety, but later on there needs to be proof that there was actual violence and not a few innocent emails, like my case. The judge could not have seen truthful evidence in my case. The wife of a man who was my friend, was allowed to have her husband file for a TRO for her, because she wanted to punish him for being my friend. That is a travesty of justice! Buty & Curliano, a law firm in Oakland, CA, filed it against me! I cannot find legal representation! If you don't have enough money to hire an attorney, good luck! You are screwed! That law firm actually hit a quadriplegic man with a TRO! That law firm also represents Kaiser Permanente, and they allow their doctors to have them as a little freebie for all their legal, and not so legal needs! Buty and Curliano should be ashamed of themselves for perpetuating false TROs! I got 2.5 year TRO for writing a few emails to my doctor asking him if I had done anything wrong, and apologised for it! To allow a jealous wealthy doctor wife, to pervert the legal system is criminal! A law firm that allows it, is worse! They are spreading inequality, and hate! How they can get away with it, is a testament to undermining our entire system of justice. Please tell Buty & Curliano to stop their harmful, hateful, criminal behavior!

"Each Day"
Each day I cry my heart out. Solitary grief pushing me to a precipice of nonexistence."Dear God please help me hang on!"
The psychiatrist, at the behest of another; could not have hurt me more if she had beaten me with a stick.
I wish she would have.
At least the pain would only be physical. I would heal better.
I endure the suffering that comes with a violent and invasive mental attack, that was relentless.
It IS relentless.
My mind is in agony. Torment.
This wasn't a casual attack; it was meant to destroy.
It was planned to the smallest demonic detail.
Deprived me of the friend who enhanced my life; and holds my heart.
With more cruelty than a sadist, she legally turned me into an attacker; when I myself have known the savagery of being attacked.
She knew that about me. Role reversal. Feel the shame. Feel the anger that cannot be displayed. Humiliation twists my soul.
Toe the legal line, or pay the price. Live as a pariah, and get used to it; it is my identity now.
Rivers of holy water won't wash me clean.
Goodness means nothing. Kindness made me an easy target. I am reviled for it. Being innocent is worthless. No one cares.
I was gutted and left for dead...but somehow the tears keep flowing.
Jesus wept.
Recently, a man named Eulalio Tordil was served with a Protective Order, that was issued with NO TRIAL, NO DUE PROCESS, and NO burden of PROOF whatsoever... it was based SOLELY on an ACCUSATION. The accuser had MANY incentives to accuse... try $1,000 a month for one, "possession of the family car" for two, as well as many others.

Based ONLY on this accusation, he was kicked out of his OWN house, assumed an abuser, ordered to PAY almost $1,000 a month to his accuser, and give up his firearms (he was an employee for Federal Protective Services, he's REQUIRED to have a firearm, for his JOB).. So, his job was in jeopardy, he was ASSUMED an abuser, he was HOMELESS, AND he had to PAY his accuser $1,000 a month!! ....ALL from a woman's accusation, that was mainly based on "he made the kids do military style training".

Well, Eulalio Tordil didn't like having his MOST BASIC civil rights VIOLATED! He couldn't handle being kicked out of his OWN house, made homeless, labeled an "abuser" with NO TRIAL or due process whatsoever, AND ordered to pay $1,000 a month... So, Eulalio Tordil shot and killed his "accuser"... as well as several other people.

It has happened many times before, and it will happen again. When will you retarded lawmakers realize that YOU are CAUSING the violence! What do you NOT understand about innocent, until proven guilty? This man was NEVER convicted of anything! ...but he was made homeless, almost lost his job, was labeled an abuser, and ordered to pay $1,000 a month to his accuser! YOU allow these people to falsely accuse, and DRIVE people to VIOLENCE! How did that Protective Order work out for the "accuser"? It didn't work!... because its a piece of PAPER.... However it DID actually CAUSE the very VIOLENCE that it is designed to prevent!

Protective Orders are in DIRECT violation of the US constitution.... the right to a fair TRIAL, the right to DUE PROCESS, the right to face your accuser in a court of law, and the right to be presumed INNOCENT, until proven guilty in a court of law. There are NONE of those with a Protective Order! NONE! That's why its called an ex-parte' order (ex-parte' means: without trial)

Also, Protective Orders DON'T work. If Protective Orders worked, then we could give one to every person... then everyone would be safe and protected.

Keep allowing the FALSE ACCUSERS, you morons.... and the violence will continue.

I had enough self control, to NOT do that to my false accuser, but many others DON'T.

The False Accusations are PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE! The Protective Orders ARE the abuse!
My ex wife works for a company that councils abused children in Washington state. They work closely with DSHS. When it came time for our divorce, she knew exactly how the system worked. She put me through the ringer. 4 years later, I'm still in the system. There was no proof of any abuse. The judge said "I believe her over you" and gave her a 1 year protection order. I ended up with three - 3rd party communication violations of it. They prosecuted me like I kicked her door down. I've never laid a finger on my ex wife, my children, my current fiancÚ or my step children ( which they all would gladly testify). My 20 year son barely talks to his mother anymore and my 18 year old daughter moved to Idaho with me as soon as she turned 18. My ex is an alcoholic, pocketed my child support (which she lied through her teeth about and didn't notify me of court dates by lying about my address. Funny how she got it correct on all the dv paperwork.) and then left my kids to live with her 70 year old parents while she partied her life away.
I only have 2 years of probation left, have lost my weapon rights, am a convicted DV offender and owe $18,000 in rear support. But, my children know the truth and my life has returned to normal.
My ex wife works for a company that councils abused children in Washington state. They work closely with DSHS. When it came time for our divorce, she knew exactly how the system worked. She put me through the ringer. 4 years later, I'm still in the system. There was no proof of any abuse. The judge said "I believe her over you" and gave her a 1 year protection order. I ended up with three - 3rd party communication violations of it. They prosecuted me like I kicked her door down. I've never laid a finger on my ex wife, my children, my current fiancÚ or my step children ( which they all would gladly testify). My 20 year son barely talks to his mother anymore and my 18 year old daughter moved to Idaho with me as soon as she turned 18. My ex is an alcoholic, pocketed my child support (which she lied through her teeth about and didn't notify me of court dates by lying about my address. Funny how she got it correct on all the dv paperwork.) and then left my kids to live with her 70 year old parents while she partied her life away.
I only have 2 years of probation left, have lost my weapon rights, am a convicted DV offender and owe $18,000 in rear support. But, my children know the truth and my life has returned to normal.
My ex girlfriend who is a Westminster Police Officer in California decided to file Multiple false reports of domestic violence in June and August of 2014, and dragged me into custody courts and get the order approved without presenting any evidence. Then between August - November of 2014, my ex goes out of her to make my visitation difficult.and continues to use our son as a tool to hurt me. She violates the signed the October 2014 custody order for visitation and joint custody and begins her game of keeping my son from me. During this time i am calling the San Dimas Sheriffs and her agency to ask for help. They both refuse and tell me they cant do anything. They tell me to go back to court.
December 2014 she has me arrested and charged with Terrorist Threats with intent to resulting in Death and Stalking. She claims and provide copies of emails I sent her. She also claims I stole a gun from her, and that I stole one the vehicles we have. The Gun she claims i stole was actually taken by her and she denied she had and even failed to mention it on the restraining order, and it was given back to me after I spent time and had sex with her.back in October 2014. She claims she found it after cleaning out her closet, behind a pile of shoes? The car was awarded to me and was written on the custody order that was signed October
30, 2014. Both of these officers refused to believe me calling me a liar and that i was going to spend a long time in jail.
I even advised them that I was and I did have proof that the car was currently out of service as it needed a transmission cooler, and that cooling system failed, plus had a bad battery, and that i made her aware of these issues back in Late November and had proof of the email i sent that had pictures. They refused to ask her or investigate those to false claims. I told them she was setting me up and that they please investigate her and review my files and speak with family and even neighbors, and they refused telling me to be man, be responsible for my actions?? On that same day my ex shows up at my parents house where i lived and where the car was, as she pretends to cry hugs my mother which is something she has never done, including to her own mother, she continues to to my mother, father,sister and brother inlaw and claims she didn't report me, and doesn't know what happened, she didn't do anything to cause this, and that her agency had me arrested because i kept sending her agency and her city officials harrasing and threatening emails. Two minutes later she is lying to my brother in law stating i took the car Two weeks ago and refused to take it back? During this event my mother is telling her she cant move the car because it broken down and wont run. She ignores my mother and continues to lie about how i borrowed it and so..and then gets in the car and tries to start it repeatedly, while this is happening my mother telling her again she cant take it plus she knows i was awarded the car, and
I feel this action that was falsely accused of me by my mentally ill ex wife of 32 years and signed by a judge is a huge miscarriage of justice and has promoted child abuse of my daughter and much mental and emotional distress of myself. This has been carried to far in our judicial system. I do not nor have ever condoned or participated in any kind of abuse. Misuse of the Judicial system for spiteful revenge should NEVER BE ALLOWED! Thank you for your consideration of this matter.
More than 10 complaints. Even when proven false, nothing is done against the accuser..... IS that Justice?
In mid 2014 I got it's a relationship with a female that was raised an rape by her stepfather and she end up accusing me of the d violence and they try to charge me with a DV of the 4th░ and I'm still fighting it right now like I'm my deferred is already been done since November 2016 and they revoke my deferred because of another incident now when I got that incident cleared up they are continuing to revoke my deferred due to the fact that I have open cases in another county now I'm going to try for those cases but the whole Case an scenario is there trying to destroy my life when I'm there from here but I never committed the crime
They should pay attention to the accusers past claims of domestic violence with the pattern of break ups/divorce and how they scream it after the relationship has ended.
They should pay attention to the accusers past claims of domestic violence with the pattern of break ups/divorce and how they scream it after the relationship has ended.
This is crazy and happening in my family right now.
There needs to be better equality in family law.
I understand the need for emergency safety, but later on there needs to be proof that there was actual violence and not a few innocent emails, like my case. The judge could not have seen truthful evidence in my case. The wife of a man who was my friend, was allowed to have her husband file for a TRO for her, because she wanted to punish him for being my friend. That is a travesty of justice! Buty & Curliano, a law firm in Oakland, CA, filed it against me! I cannot find legal representation! If you don't have enough money to hire an attorney, good luck! You are screwed! That law firm actually hit a quadriplegic man with a TRO! That law firm also represents Kaiser Permanente, and they allow their doctors to have them as a little freebie for all their legal, and not so legal needs! Buty and Curliano should be ashamed of themselves for perpetuating false TROs! I got 2.5 year TRO for writing a few emails to my doctor asking him if I had done anything wrong, and apologised for it! To allow a jealous wealthy doctor wife, to pervert the legal system is criminal! A law firm that allows it, is worse! They are spreading inequality, and hate! How they can get away with it, is a testament to undermining our entire system of justice. Please tell Buty & Curliano to stop their harmful, hateful, criminal behavior!
I'm living in domestic abuse and I was arrested. I was being chocked by my spouse and I tried to get my spouse to stop. My spouse had a bruise on the arm and so I was locked up. I asked the police officer, what was I suppose to do, just let me be strangled to death? The police offsider l officer said yes. Now everyday since, I'm hit and threatened. I'm so scared and it seems like no one cares. I'm on probation now and I'm unable to go back home. I was wrongly accused while my abuser walks free and keeps on tormenting me. Please, I beg you to help!
It's happening to me I'm a disabled vet and I can't afford this.
In support of the Fathers Rights Movement to help stop the criminalization of fathers by family courts. The idea of controlling and aggression appears to be only associated with the male in current family courts even when there is no evidence or evidence to the contrary. The female in these cases can berate, evade, attack (physically or verbally), and be overtly aggressive not to mention passive-aggressive without any consequences. As soon as the male attempts to get involved in joint decision making and maintaining awareness of happenings with their children they will almost inevitably be accused of being controlling or aggressive in some manner (criminalize) as a pretense to controlling the males involvement with their children. From my perspective this is the root issue in family courts that needs to be addressed via some form of a social justice campaign that reveals the inaccuracies and inconsistencies in this form of gender discrimination. The underlying negative stereotyping and resulting stigmas must be addressed to enable change, equal rights, and protections under the law.
Please be aware that even though the letter above refers to men being falsely accused, women are falsely accused as well. These false allegations need to be stopped. This is perjury and it is a crime and needs to be held accountable to the highest degree, not just given a slap on the wrist and ignored. These false allegations ruin innocent people's lives all because of a vindictive, lying and malicious ex who still wants control. If our courts truly represent justice, then let justice prevail in all aspects and on all judiciary levels, this includes judges who spend only a few minutes looking at a petition or who deny the defendant to appear by phone when in another state. Shame on our system.
Im being fasely accussed of dv and my victim lied told the judge she lied and im still serving time im innocent
My name is Joseph Saddlerjr. I'm a resident of Buffalo NY. I was convicted of assault in the third degree which I did not commit. I did hit Shamaya Stots back in self defense but I did not assault her. She showed up to my house 2 hours after I told her that I was not attracted to her at all. She hit me at least 20 to 30 times before I fought back. When I hit back she called the police. No one asked my side at all. My Public defenders judgement from the very beginning was to take a plea only. The judge treated me Luke I was guilty & I was afraid so I took the plea & was sentenced to 90 days. When I got out I found my home was broken into. I lost everything & am now forced to live out of my car, when I just had a fully furnished 3 bedroom home. Everything's gone. I'm rebuilding but it's a long road ahead. Just the other day Shamaya Stots told the police I was following her. They didn't believe her this time because I have video of her following me to my job where she parked & was stalking me.
out of no where cops at my house removing my firearms, etc, all false and the best is no accountability even if I successfully defend. Thought due process still existed, outrageous. All thats needed is a lie and and attorney and I a, losing my property, need attorney and have to defend my entire life. Quite scary situation and very stiff consequences even though I have not been heard, and the order temporary. Wow and best I have to prove I am innocent. Think this needs to change to say the least
I have been falsely charged 10 times and never convicted. But she did play the court like a fiddle, and i think the sick twisted court likes it, and i know the lawyers are getting feed well on this one. Sick bunch of twisted people in our legal systen. They know its wrong and drain you of every dime because they can. Not very honorable1
The mother of my children has been vindictive and practicing this digusting behavior of filing false allegation statement to obtain the family courts help to issue another 5 year stay away .Granted one 5 year stay away irder just expired so in order to obtain another order she straight lies and makes up unprovable allegations .But since the court system is one sided i have two outstanding warrents for my person because of lies .Know i have to scrap to get money for bail and legal representstion something needs to be done about people who cry wolf .
I thought I was the only one dealing with this issue. My cheating ex decided to bring her new play toy into the home we once shared. I come home from work and a hour and a half later, I am sitting in jail for domestic violence. I did not touch her however my integrity is being questioned the criminal justice system. After losing my home and job, I have to depend on friends and family to make sure I can attend my court dates. This was all set up by my ex and now I can only pray for the state to dismissed these bogus claims. Meanwhile she enjoys the home we built. I am trying to make sense of how this system be so broken? I never been in trouble with the law yet feel like a menace to society because she said so. This has to stop!
We must use technology to stop this from both sides www.noliemri.com
If it's proven a false accusation was made, the accuser should be punished
If it's proven a false accusation was made, the accuser should be punished
I'm experiencing this firsthand right as we speak my daughter's mother told everybody and the courts that I grabbed her and that I threatened to kill her and that I picked up a chair and threw it across the room that I'm picking up objects that weigh hundreds of pounds in the house them across the room and fits of Rage but yet I'm disabled I have a 35 pound lifting restrictions I'm treated as though I'm guilty I haven't had one chance to be heard because the three times that I petition the court to be heard of modification of the false restraining order they held the hearing and didn't notify me and then charge me for not being there family court is corrupt and needs to be interviewed by the highest Justice of the mall are US Congress I'm sure some of you are father's
30 years ago when I was a victim of abuse I had to flee to shelters to get away. Police walking into my house without opening the door, the refrigerator 6' away leaning on the counter and the house torn up wasn't enough proof. Just because I didn't have blood pouring from me only torn clothes I couldn't get the help. It didn't take long to get that evidence BUT now look at it! As a woman I have seen countless woman use the PFA order as a weapon a tool to inflict severe damage to the man. It is their form of getting back. It stays on the man's record and can and has prevented job loss. The pitiful abuse counselors don't due the job they should and just encourage, support and provide free legal advice and counsel. It is job security for them. Yes I said job security their words not mine! All it takes is to prosecute those who are habitual violators of the law. Quit letting them walk away1
My son has just been sentenced to leavenworth for 8 months for false allegations of domestic after a 2 year investigation by CID for false sexual assault charges.
As soon as my fiance and I started dating his ex said from day one she was going to ruin him. 8 months later after kidnapping his kids and facing charges she told police he strangled her. We have been depleted financially and emotionally. We've lost everything and now his lawyer wants more money. During the month he was in jail on a 200,000 dollar bond she had police called saying I was using drugs, starving my children, abusing them you name it. Shes sowicked a true NARCISSIT. His lawyer wont read all the text proving she wanted to ruin him and slowly manipulating his kids into hating us. Hes planning to taken it to trial but now we can't afford a lawyer. This has got to stop!!!! Please text me 2082499570 if anyone has advice I will lose all my faith if heis found guilty
This has to Stop!!!
I am in the midst of this nightmare with absolutely no chance to have my voice heard in this legal system. I was forced out of my home, separated from my son, and am just about broke trying to fight the allegations of my sick wife. Enough!!!!
To the person in west palmbeach.you need to call me.my name is mike kaminski 607-725-8377.I went through this in fort lauderdale over a year ago and now I live in boca raton.my russian scam artist exwife olena forced me to spend 300 grand alone in attornies fees defending myself repeatidly against false allegations.in the end I got full custody of our little girl.I had a womens organization called "no more tears" in broward county financing my ex and encourging her to keep doing this to me.
I have been accused not once but twice of abusing my child. My ex continues to lie and try to manipulate the system. She has lost the petition twice and still not held liable for what she has done. I don't doubt she will do it again. What is a man suppose to do?
I have a mentally ill ex that is trying to do this to me. I am a great father and she served a 4 month sentence got out on a stay now has caused emotional and physical harm to my daughter. She knows if we go to court she will lose custody so making false accusations is her only way out. Please help I am an upstanding pillar in the community and she is a 4 time convicted felon. I did so much to better my daughter while she was in jail and now she is unwinding all the good I did . I just got my daughter back today with a cast on her leg. Only difference is I record every interaction. She screams in front of my daughter and makes her cry it's not right then says i am controlling.She should be back in jail where she belongs.
It's not fair
It's about time that woman should be held accountable for false alligations and be arrested .I'm sick of pathologic liars getting away with this .
Both her, the advocates, and the courts made me a victim of her for two consecutive three year terms.I am now labeled a violent offender by this system of abuse.my life has gone down the shitter, and I have been made homeless since 2008.god help me please?
I have a relative who is serving five years in federal prison for an accusation with no DNA but he did not have an alibi. This girl lied many times and could be proven a lie however in the federal prison system your chances of winning is going to jury trial or 2%. 98% of the time the federal government Wins their cases. Especially when it involves women against men. In those cases the jury is already condensed that the defendant or accused is guilty. The HEPA laws are also keeping the truth from being revealed when the accuser tells the truth to a psychiatrist or Doctor Who cannot say anything because of the HEPA law. I pray every day that this girl will finally tell the truth to someone who can and will get it to the right people so that my son can finally get out of prison! He's in prison for uploading a video which was really a video of him and his 29-year-old girlfriend and not of this other girl. But once again because of an alibi or him not having an alibi at the time the video was uploaded he's doing five years in Federal prison. The guy that the DNA did match is also doing five years in federal prison his is for statutory rape. This girl got 15 men in trouble over the Internet within five states. Our justice system really needs to be fixed and a mandatory minimums need to be changed according to the crimes.
I have a relative who is serving five years in federal prison for an accusation with no DNA but he did not have an alibi. This girl lied many times and could be proven a lie however in the federal prison system your chances of winning is going to jury trial or 2%. 98% of the time the federal government Wins their cases. Especially when it involves women against men. In those cases the jury is already condensed that the defendant or accused is guilty. The HEPA laws are also keeping the truth from being revealed when the accuser tells the truth to a psychiatrist or Doctor Who cannot say anything because of the HEPA law. I pray every day that this girl will finally tell the truth to someone who can and will get it to the right people so that my son can finally get out of prison! He's in prison for uploading a video which was really a video of him and his 29-year-old girlfriend and not of this other girl. But once again because of an alibi or him not having an alibi at the time the video was uploaded he's doing five years in Federal prison. The guy that the DNA did match is also doing five years in federal prison his is for statutory rape. This girl got 15 men in trouble over the Internet within five states. Our justice system really needs to be fixed and a mandatory minimums need to be changed according to the crimes.
There is a prejudice that only men get falsely accused. I was falsely accused and my husband is a abuser and he went ahead and filed the charges against me and evicted me out of home on Friday night in front of our three children terrorizing them. I was also forced to have no contact with the children for almost 2 weeks. He submitted false pictures and it was proven but there was NO punishment, even when judge saw that the pictures had wrong dates than what he said. The law is on the side of people with money, By allowing NO consequences for lying to the court, what message the judicial system is sending. My teenager said to me -- why lying is bad? Look at my father, he gets away from everything. Lying is only bad if you are poor and can't afford a good attorney.
I was handed a protective order and falsely accused of domestic violence by my roommate who I never have been involved with and the barest of relationships other than paying rent, filed and claimed while I was out of state, only to return a few days later and be arrested at work in front of all my colleagues, as well as filed a protective order barring me from my home, and many other places, which I've never been to and could care less for. My lawyer had the case dropped with prejudice without even going to trial and the D.A. dropped my case because it's frivolous and the charges make no sense. Yet despite all that I spent a fortune on legal fees, hotels, etc as well as having a tarnished reputation at work, and having to move, my lawyer says her petition for a protective order amounts to perjury and effectively a forced eviction. No one should have to go through this, I am not guilty of a crime I was incapable of committing because I was hundreds of miles away and had to pay for the privilege of being vindicated. I am now in the process of having the courts expunge and seal all records, as well as pending lawsuits against my former landlords and roommate, and possibly the court systems and local police department. You need to fix this law, because this should have never been granted a second look, especially without evidence and I should have never had to go through this ordeal. No one should, and now because I have I am forced to take legal action against all those involved including the government and agencies involved. Perjury and Perversion of Justice is serious and those pushing or approving of false accusations should be held accountable legally for their actions. You need to make sure that laws are written to allow for that to happen, because until then it is guilty until proven innocent and those truly guilty will walk free to continue. Prosecute perjury.
I'm a very large adult male and served a tour of duty in the military. I practiced many forms of self-defense, but no amount of preparation could have prepared me for being VICTIM of the system in this regard. The one I trusted the most used the system against me with no real reason to do so. My children are the ones who are suffering the most however and are the biggest victims of the games she plays with not only myself, but many others.
My wife accused me o domestic violense for the second time ..the firs she claim i beat her up on detroit michigan and 4 day left and go to iowa and she make those claims on iowa for something happen n detroit michigan one week before .and this time happen on detroit i got arrested and relish next mornings we the cases dismiss...
I found this to be a profound and much needed move of justice. It's time women should be held accountable for making false allegations, be held accountable, charged and jailed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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