Stop False Allegations of Domestic Violence

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Some recent comments: these messages are published with permission of the signer.

My life is being destroyed over this. My own mother has abused and falsely accused me of this crime without any proof whatsoever! I am angry, and upset that the laws in this country can be easily misused to harm someone innocent like me! I can't get a job, I can't do anything because of these false accusations against me.. Guilty until proven innocent is not justice! Does this mean I can file a DV case against anyone and get away with it? I was assaulted by a tenant my mother unlawfully rented a room to in my house and when I call the police to do their jobs they do NOTHING! and he walks away free. Race has everything to do with it these days. And changes need to be mad but I doubt anything will ever change. I'm a good man with no prior sand yet I get treated like a animal over false accusations?? What is this country coming to?! Or has it been this way all along? I don't have any money and I'm living with a illness that keeps me hospitalized for days to weeks at a time and jail will probably kill me. This is my second go around going thru litigation's in court. I thought I beat it the first time but I was ignorant. I didn't do my homework. My fellow falsely accused, please be smart and take and stay away from all women who do these type of things. Get to know a woman before you sleep with her or put a ring on her finger. And if it's a family thing like mine then I can only say stay far away from any family who would have the nerve to have you thrown in jail because that's not what family does. GOD BLESS THE INNOCENT!
My case is very similar. I love my wife and always believed she loved me as well. Maybe I was too innocent. My wife has manipulated the system twice (at least while together, and I'm pretty sure she has done it in the past, more than once) and sent me to jail both times. The first time (while intoxicated and after reading a text message from my ex-wife) in an act of jealousy and rage she called the police and falsely accused me of threatening her life. During our trial she admitted her lies yet I was forced to plead guilty to a misdemeanor, even after going to jail for 5 weeks, not to mention enduring 3 years of court appearances, domestic violence classes and thousands of dollars in attorney’s fees. I spent an exuberant amount of money in a period of 4 years due to her insecurities, childhood traumatic experiences and unresolved issues.

Secondly and most recently, I discovered emails of an affair she had been having for a few months with an ex-boyfriend. I told her I was filing for legal separation due to her irresponsible behavior at home, with her job and with our two little ones, because of her excessive use of alcohol, and now an affair. I told her I was going to send the emails (which are clear proof of the affair) to her parents, to my family and to her "lover's wife”. She decided to stop me one way or another. She immediately left home, leaving me with our two children to finish feeding them and putting them in bed (a task that I completed joyfully every night of their lives). An hour later the cops arrived at our home, arrested me for allegedly "pushing her and causing her great fear". Needless to say, I went to jail again. She knew I had past D.V. charges on my record and felt it to her advantage to use this against me in her current situation, falsely accusing me again.
While I was incarcerated, she erased the affair emails, reset one of my online account passwords, reset my online personal bank account password, transferred all my savings to her personal bank account, called immigration stating she would no longer support my petition to become a citizen, forged my signature to get an extra check from my employment, filed a restraining order against me preventing any future contact with my children, filed for divorce, filed taxes behind my back, taking six thousand dollars, and leaving me without a car, home, kids, money, and in jail. And she was just getting started with her vindictive behavior.
She grabbed my clothes and other personal items and threw them in a storage facility, leaving the keys at the police station. She kept my iphone, my tablet, my laptop, items containing thousands of videos pictures and even audio recordings that are proof of my dedication and commitment to our marriage and our children. She accused me of "being on drugs”, and gave my passport to the police. It contained my residency stamp which legally authorizes me live and work in the US, falsely stating that I was going to kill her and leave the count
There's a deep problem with the way police currently assess domestic violence. I come from a very dysfunctional family. In April 2010, I was falsely accused of domestic violence by a family member. She attacked me and eventually put me in a headlock. I bit her arm, trying to escape. Another family member called the police to try to protect me, but when the police arrived, she was the one bleeding (from the bite mark), so they arrested me instead. The case was dismissed. Another family member of mine uses this arrest against me all the time. He is physically abusive and whenever he is angry, he threatens to call the police and tell them I was violent because he knows the local police have arrested me for domestic violence before. When I got sick of his physical abuse, I grabbed the phone to call the police. He tackled me to the ground and tried to rip it out of my hands. I bit his hand to try to get him to let go of me. When he finally did, I ran downstairs to the neighbors, who called the police to try to help me because they heard everything and had witnessed the abuse for years (we live in an apartment). I'm sure you can guess what happened next. The police arrived, saw him bleeding, and arrested me for domestic violence again. They didn't even bother to talk to the neighbors who heard the entire fight. This case hasn't been dismissed yet because it takes several court dates, but I was arrested the second time in September 2013. Unfortunately, I am a student and do not make enough to support myself. I lost my internship because of this incident (I worked with autistic children and people who have been accused of domestic violence are not allowed to work with children), so I'm forced to remain dependent on the family member who had me falsely arrested the second time after he was the abusive person. He is still abusive to me, but there's nothing I can do about it. I have nowhere else to go because our family is so dysfunctional and my friends went to college out-of-state. The police are prejudiced against me and I don't trust them anymore. Police officers should be trained to evaluate domestic violence situations objectively and officers need to understand that all is not always what it seems. Both of the people who falsely accused me are mentally ill. The first has borderline personality disorder and the second is an alcoholic. He was even drunk at the time of the incident. Police need to be trained about mental illness to prevent people with personality disorders and addictions from manipulating the system. These false accusations have destroyed my peace of mind, my reputation, my internship, and my ability to trust others. False domestic violence allegations need to stop. They ruin lives, waste court time, encourage abusive behavior, and teach abusers how to escalate their behavior without facing consequences.
This is a well intended law to protect true victims of domestic violence. Unfortunately, in some cases, it is used by some as a sword rather then a shield. Law enforcement, who are the responders to complaints of domestic violence, need to be trained in objectively evaluating any complaints for validity and authenticity. The laws also need to give police officers the discretion to respond according to a complete evaluation of the facts and circumstance. Laws that require mandatory arrests of accused individials based primarily on the word of the accuser.
And the call and arrest policy that is in effect. Just because a call was made the accused is assumed to be guilty and arrested. There is something innately wrong with that.
Feminist say they want equality for men and women but this isn't it when the legal system is bias towards men in these situation. Men are at there whim and its not looked at equally but with bias
I was arrested covered with blood after being beat from behind by my daughter with a solid body guitar, smashed over the head with a hollow body guitar and then my son attempted to put my eyes out with the leg casters of a chairand the lower legs caused blood flow from my chest and stomach. When San Diego county sheriffs lemon grove office(6 cars) arrived, they removed me from my bed, separated me from my family and screamed someone is going to jail and that,"somebody" is looking a lot like you!
I am so emotionally distraught there is not a day that I don't think of suicide and have made several attempts to no avail because my wife interveined.
We were back together the following day but in anger the night of the arrest she made false statements of an egregious nature and CPS was already involved threatening to separate our 5 kids into separate foster homes. They are afraid of me after making the false statements they were told by CPS and their mother to make.
We all had great relationships. And now it is as if They were killed in a plane crash. I do not want to be on this earth. I have considered pouring 5 gallons of gas on myself and firing it up. My life, health and career is destroyed and I am homeless.
I loved my wife and thought she loved me as well. Maybe I was too innocent. My wife has manipulated the system twice, and sent me to jail both times. The first time (while intoxicated and after reading a text message from my ex wife) she called the cops and falsely accused me of threaten her life. Later she admitted in trial her lies and I was dismissed, not before going to jail for 5 weeks, 3 years of courts appearances, domestic violence classes and thousands of dollars in attorneys fees.We spent an exuberant amount of money in a period of 4 years due to her insecurities, childhood traumatic experiences and unresolved issues. Recently, I discovered an affair she had been having for a few months with an ex-boyfriend, when I told her I had decided to file for legal separation, because I was tired of her irresponsible behavior at home, with her job and with our two little ones due to her excess with alcohol, and now the affair and I told her I was going to send those emails (which are clear proof of the affair) to her parents, to my family and to her "lover's wife", she new she needed to stop me one way or another. She immediately left home leaving me with our two children to finish feeding them and putting them in bed. An hour later the cops arrived at home to arrest me for allegedly "pushing her and causing her great fear". Needless to say, I went to jail again, while incarcerated, she emptied my bank account, call immigration saying she would no longer support my petition to become a citizen, then forged my signature to get an extra check from my job, , filed a restraining order against me (my kids included in it) which means I cannot see them or get close to them, filed for divorce, filed taxes behind my back, taking $6K by her self and left me without a car, home, kids, money, and in jail, when I got out of jail I was homeless. She grabbed my clothes and other personal items and threw them in a storage facility, leaving the keys in the police station. Of course, she kept my iphone, my tablet, my laptop, etc..She also gave my passport with my residency stamp which authorized me to work in the US to the police, saying that I was going to kill her and leave the country, which is ridiculous!!! She stayed in the house with our kids, enjoying the jacuzzi, the swimming pool, the big yard, the cars, the money, and the boyfriend. While my family in an attempt to supporting me have spent over $15K in attorneys fees (criminal, immigration and family), bond, etc. Three months have passed and I have not being able to see my kids. She always said that I was the best dad in the planet, that everything was better when I was with them and with our kids, that I was the most amazing man she had ever met, that we would grow old together, that I was the love of her life, blah, blah, blah..Now I'm emotional drained, deep in suffering for the betrayal and all the lies and the absence of my children in my life, but most of all, the damage and pain that she is wil
My accuser asked the judge to restrain me and then, about 7 hours later, she showed up to where I was and stood within 2-3 feet of me. I'm going to lose 3-4 days of my time and close to $3000 cash to fight this frivolous case. The damage to my reputation around town is done.
There is much truth to this story .It is all real. I have watched a case where the father of 3 children has been in court for since 2006.
The marriage just became to mentally abusive for the husband . in order to keep his sanity he filed for devoice & custody of his children.
The ex-wife moved a man in with her to have some one take care of the children. This man had substance abuse & long term abuse to others. Every year he is arrested for either Drugs or assault- 52 police calls to his home.
This man began abusing the children & Girl friend .
Even with proof & pictures of the abuse the courts did nothing to help this a father protect his children. Now after 8 years .
the ex wife destroyed every thing in her home & took sword's & cut up all the children's things .When the new husband phoned the police she began throwing money into the air in front of the police.& took a bunch of pills to kill her self. Had these children been there that day they would not be alive.
The oldest of the three children gave birth to a child by the time she was 15 and being allowed to do what ever she wants by DCF & drag the infant from home to home. How ever the court has granted the father custody of the children .Only DCF has given the now 16yr old permission to go where ever she wants ,dragging this infant into danger. This is in violation of a superior court judges court order. The police were lied to by 2 teenagers and they assisted this child to run away. This older child 16 now is with a man who is violent ,has no job abuses her and holds her imprisoned.
The boy friend of the 16 year old is not a U.S.A. citizen and is demanding that this 16yr old is his wife. She has a trust fund and he needs to marry .He has threated her & stalked her .This Shows his intent.
This child has problems that she and the infant need to be Protected. DCF and Law Official's are looking the other way.
My son has been dragged thru the courts by a young vindictive ex who gave birth to his only son which she won't allow him or me to see him..we're very hurt by how the system is set up...
Been falsely accused of rape, punching and kicking my ex. All to get custody of the kids and get her legal papers. Now she is after my money.
She gets a probo no lawyer, i have to spend a fortune to defend my self. How is that fair?
I would never have believed this until my sisterinlaw did this to my brother. Its a horrible law and has cost him his children, two of whom are from a prior relationship. He owns his own business, which is also now suffering because of this person with mental illness that he tried to do the right thing and stand by. Its disgusting that the people of this country are paying for these women to be supported. In the mean time my sister was REALLY assaulted, which was witnessed, by an X, and he's out with no jail, no nothing, in another state (RI). DISGUSTING!
Isn't it sad that many of the so called"victims" self-inflict wounds? Then, once the partner is incarcerated they proceed to steal all they own, without so much as a red flag in the system.
It's beyond ridiculous that an accusor, in family court, with no proof of violencem, can hold the accused at bay with just words. The accused has his/hers 2nd amendment rights stripped when they've NOT been convicted of a court is a civil matter, not a criminal matter.
After it is proven beyond a reasonable doubt, a false accuser should be criminally charged and if found guilty let it show a conviction on their record (FALSE REPORT/FAMILY VIOLENCE)this is the only way it will STOP the false accusations and the destruction of a innocent persons reputation and careers.
Before jail and the judge is involved, any accusation of domestic violence should be screened by the PSYCHIATRIC Emergency Room. A trained psychiatrist can tell the whether or not there is a real threat of violence or a fake threat from a narcissist or borderline personality who is alleging domestic violence for financial gain. Health insurance pays for this, not taxpayer dollars. The psychiatrist can weed out the fakers and make it more likely that the only cases put in front of the judge as potentially REAL cases of domestic violence. All the other dads get to go back to their home that night and see their family (and the police can confiscate their weapons - just in case. In fact, the police can confiscate dad's key to the front door and make dad pick it up each night at the police station, if the police need to verify that dad is not dangerous on a daily basis.)
As a real victim of domestic violence, and had to go thru the horrors of my trusted loved one doing harm to me. I am glad DV laws are in effect to protect those that are truly harmed both physically and emotionally. The funds to help those that have been truly displaced by DV are being sucked up by self serving people using law to punish the X.
I am disgusted with the abuse of these laws using the legal system to "punish with jail time" the estranged husband/significant other and using these laws to steal all possessions that were accumulated in the relationship. I am a witness to such abuse of the system, and am horrified and angry that this is allowed to proceed.
The courts expect jail time, probation and fines for those accused, and look at the "accused" as a horrible person who is marked for life instead of looking at the one who is actually raping the system.
Along with the laws protecting DV victims, there also needs to be a rigid screening for those who are crying wolf. In addition, for those who are falsely using the system and the funds there should be stringent jail time and fines.
Bystanders falsely accused my fiancée of domestic violence. I as a "victim" have no say so, they do not believe anything I say, and now could possibly face being a 20-year old single mother. I'm pregnant, with no job, and now we'll both be in some form of the system.
I'm all for punishment of DV offenders BUT I'm also for punishing those who falsely accuse! Time and resources are extended to false claims that means the real DV crimes are being set aside.
Sociopaths. Their illness is costing our male friends and families millions. My friend's acusor claims kidnapping on different dates months apart and still went on her own several times inbetween and after. She was so calculating that she would pick a fight and call someone that she knew it would go to voicemail and mute out the parts she did not record. An example: she was seen on many different occasions yelling "stop, your hurting me", and he would not even be close to her. The awesome thing is she has done in front of some very reputable people, so we will see how far she gets using our tax dollars for her current obsession, trying to make others believe her lies. The time and resources that our DA's and law enforcement our using is also a crime on innocent Americans. Their time and money could be used better try to catch the serial rapist that has now struck the city of Tulsa 5 times. We as American's need to put a stop to the misuse of our funds for false aligations an charges!!!!!
I was arrested and charged with Domestic Violence by a female officer who I have made formal complaints about to her superior officer and who I have requested not to come back to the property my sister who is living in my parents estate against the law and for free and collecting rent from my parents rental property is the one who accused me. Now me being the executer of the estate my hands are tied till this is matter goes through court. As she gets rid of everything my parents worked so hard for there entire life I don't know were to turn or how to handle something like this I never touched her but here I am facing charges and a crime I never done.
My brother is in jail because his girlfriend lied to the police about him. He was denied bond, and has to wait 6 months until they can hear his side of the story. This is messed up as he didn't hurt her at all and the Alexandria Police just believe her story and locked him up on bogus charges.
My wife is and has been constantly callong the police, hitting me and now is making false allegations that I was the abuser. I have a court case very soon where I have to defend myself agains domesic violence accusations and what I've been reading is scaring the ebeejeebees out of me.
Lying, cheating, thieving, women are getting away with everything they want because of this loop hole, women wanted equality they should have equality ,Not empowerment, and entitlement with out proof,or sound evidence!!
Lying, cheating, thieving, women are getting away with everything they want because of this loop hole, women wanted equality they should have equality ,Not empowerment, and entitlement with out proof,or sound evidence!!
I am going through this situation currently. THIS TYPE OF MISUSE OF PROCESS HAS GOT TO STOP.
I can attest with personal experience how frightening and destructive false allegations of domestic violence can be, especially when used in an effort to control custody arrangements.
I am a textbook victim. Coruption also exists in the backwoods town of Waycross, GA. Please avoid this place they will take everything but your soul then legally banish you from the county.
It was false allegations and a corrupt NH family cout system that kept me from my four children for two years. I now have full custody of the three minor children. Where was my rights under the 9th and 14th amendment. Is the state going to give me that time back with my children. My ex wife was never charged with filing a false police report.. Accusations are not evidence!
This is wrong and it ruins the reputation of innocent people, and their lives. I've also had my dad be trailed guilty for "not having a damaged disk in his spine" after he cut a tree down in his job that fell on his spine that got him in a ambluance.My dad has a ice pack to cool nerve pain pinching everyday.His doctors in soundshore have his medical records and x-rays of his injury.Our court system is corrupt, my dad was obviously innocent and he had to pay 300 dollars in guilty verdict.
My son is sitting in jail right now because of a vindictive wife who claims he sexually assaulted her. The ironic joke is that my son caught her and a strange man in their bed, the man ran off and she claims my son raped her. The DNA will prove to be the other mans. But because she claims her and my son had sex that he raped her. He has been setting in jail for over a year awaiting DNA results. I haven't had the money to bond him out, so please don't think of me as a bad mother. This woman accused a 16 yr old of rape when she was younger. She committed bigamy against her 1st husband, married her 2nd husband and was legally given her maiden name back and had the nerve to put her second husbands name on my son and her marriage license. She is a very evil, vindictive and deceitful woman. She is attractive so the deputies fall at her feet and she does no wrong. The one party rule needs to be changed. When a man or woman's life is at stake all parties involved should be allowed to have their past questioned.
Yes . I am against these false accusations being made by women for their own purpose they use man like hell abuse there husband and make false statement that the husband is abusing them Ladies from india too to came to USA once they are here say that they dont like him and lie use police for thier support police only believe the Ladies she use him she was toturing her husband the
man was so innocent she uses him to came to USA
as a ticket is there anyone can help to do something about it
Get her back to were she belong

support and police only believe the Ladies all lies
I am marrying my fiance next month. I have 3 children who I have taken care of by myself until he has came into our lives. He has a 2 year old beautiful little princess. His ex-girlfriend of a few months has accused him of abuse for the last 2 years. First it started with neglect and that he was unfit to care for her. Now it has turned into him and our family showing her "bad" things and sexually abusing her. I am so sad that a mother could put her child through this with the only intent to hurt her father. She has NEVER been reprimanded for her accusations nor has anyone ever told her to stop. She calls CPS all the time with false accusations and wastes their time. It baffles me that these women/men can accuse with malicious intent and never have anything said to them. This is all done out of spite. Who gets punished or hurt from this? The child/children that are involved. Something has to be done!
Yes . I am against these false accusations being made by women for their own purposes. I have sent an email to white house about 3-4 years back complaining the same but I did not get any reply.
Hoping this petition is taken into consideration .
Thank you.
It is well known now in other parts of the countries, especially in India, that a woman can fraudulently accuse her husband of domestic violence in US and get away with it.
This loop hole is being used to marry in and enter this country and with a claim of domestic violence, legally obtain residency in US and later the rest of the family joins in.
If the laws can be changed, this will stop the false accusations. It hurts the accused, their families and the real abused victims.
This is sick since as who would believe the suffering of real domestic violence victims.

Our justice system is not being fair when a women can pick up a phone and call the police and claim domestic violence with lies and declare it to be the truth..
even when their spouse are not at home.

It is shame that a woman can lie and ruin a mans life.
Innocent until proven guilty...isn't that the American way?
specifically to gain entrance into the United States. It happens all to often. Arranged marriage's in India, wife stays until she says she is pregnant, gains entrance. the baby is born Oh and guess what? She won't let her husband touch or hold his new baby, after about 3 months she claims spousal abuse and has him arrested.....never has been arraigned. She runs away to another state and does not communicate with husband or his family who brought her here. Husband goes to court and requests a DNA test and what do you know? The baby is not his. Now this woman (if you can call her one) will bring her whole family who we will pay taxes for to live and have medical care. It's not right.
Granddaughter lied. was under the controw of 19 year old boyfriend who was having sex with her. She was 15. I spent 363 days in jail and to get out had to take a plea deal so I could fight it from the outside. The system is corrupt. Plea deal? No sex charges, no probation, no classes, no tag, no restricrtion at all. They hit me with Felony Battery. I am totally innocent of that charge as well. It was either take the plea or spend who knows how long in jail. The publis Pretenders, oops, Public Defenders were worthless. I will sue both in civil court and I will win. Take good notes of everything right after you are approached by the officer till the time you get out.

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