Stop False Allegations of Domestic Violence

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Some recent comments: these messages are published with permission of the signer.

My boyfriend was falsely accused by his ex wife (a woman was ironically convicted of domestic assault on a man) who had done the same thing to two other men and her own son also) All three subsequently divorced her. But not before she nearly destroyed all of them financially and mentally. His rights in court were laughable. His arrest was a civil rights nightmare. This needs to be stopped. I am all for stopping abuse against women, but this is going the other way entirely.
I am the victim of this stated Abuse of the Domestic Abuse Law, a previously spotless record, Now with Multiple problems along with the inability to even return to my own home which I have owned for almost 10 years, where she has only lived for a mere 5 months.....until an undisclosed mental ilness showed its face in forms of self harm, sucide attempts, and manipulation, lies, and so much more.
My ex is constantly harrassing me and using our son as a weapon. An alcoholic bi polor off her meds and going off trying everyday to attack me. Guardian Ad Litems and County Commissioners sit on hands. While my son suffers from her mental condition. Help Dads get a fair shake. Get those who falsely accuse arrested as well. It is a mountainous problem.
I have SO MUCH more to tell, but let's bring this to a close with the fact that last week in court the Prosecution decided to "In the Interest of Justice" dismiss all charges against me. Great, but I still lost my home, over $100k defending myself, 6 months of employment, and 130lbs from stress, damaging my heath greatly and permanently.

Land of the Free (as long as no one accuses you), Home of the Brave. Don't know if I'll EVER be brave enough to trust anyone again, especially romantically.

Thanks for listening....
I can give a very personal testimonial to how this happens and what it can do to your life. I was falsely accused in my hometown or Tulsa OK in May of 2014 by my (at the time) cohabiting girlfriend of one year.

In May she filed with the Collinsville OK PD that I had, on multiple occasions throughout 2014, (Feb. & April) stalked, abducted kidnapped, raped, assaulted and attempted to strangle her to death. The charges were filed in court on a day in which she had called me numerous times, and everything was great and she was looking forward to seeing me later (conversations witnessed) and she also sent several "I love you" emails the same day.

The Collinsville PD waited until I left my home for ONE HOUR for dinner to raid with over a dozen officers, destroying BOTH entry doors to my home, as well as the GUEST HOUSE door, in which I did not even live in, and they knew it. They seized numerous computers, printers, cable modems, zip drives, cameras, video cameras and cell phones. I later was informed that they had been watching my house all day, and waited until I left and they knew no one was home to enter and destroy my property.

I turned myself in to authorities, was held without bail for ten days, finally my attorney got them to set bail at $149,000, and I posted the $14,000 to get out.

I lost my home, my job, and was blasted on social media and verbally by my accuser AND some of the Collinsville detectives, one of them even calling people from my contacts in my computer telling them I WAS GUILTY of these crimes and was going to be jailed for life. People, including some of the detectives associates called me to tell me this. This same accusing body of law enforcement had TWICE in September 2013 removed her from the home and placed her on psychiatric hold in hospital for threatening to hurt family members OR kill herself, which she attempted in Jan & Feb 2014, as well as three other times in previous years. She has been under lengthy counseling for mental illness, and has been deemed dangerous to herself and others, but the NEITHER the detectives NOT the Tulsa County prosecutor took any of that into consideration.

Wait, did I fail to mention that she has accused a past fiance, several of her mother's partners and even a family member of sexual battery &/or rape in past? This was never considered either.....

My accuser even called my attorney, and in a recorded conversation in front of two other attorneys claimed that she had lied, did not want to see me prosecuted, and would drop all claims against me if I would meet with her, where we could work it all out, get married and have the family she wanted so badly, all while sending me fake untrasounds of the baby she WASN'T carrying......Classic.

An 18 year old girl who I had never even met in person (a high-school classmates daughter) had messaged her on FB to ask her why she had done this and was charged and jailed for Intimidating a State Witness........

I have
Sadly Very true . If you are a victim you will be reported to child protective services, ending an extensive interviews, harassment, involuntary interviews with your children, hair follicle analysis. Keep the government out of your personal family affairs. The system is corrupt.
I'm a woman who's ex recently filed a TRO (I have to be in court all day Xmas eve to wait for my hearing) in retaliation for filing paperwork that my CONVICTED ex (years of horrible mental, emotional and physical abuse and rape) was in contempt of court for refusing to return my son as scheduled last weekend.
He said in the report "my son said he'd rather die than go back to his mom's. I'm worried he'll hurt himself if he goes back" and he said my son "always pleeds (he's retarded and can't spell and always makes himself look like a dumb*****in court) with me not to send him back to his mom's". My ex ALWAYS returns my son 1-4 hours early EVERY time he comes back to my house twice a week. If my son was in danger then why does he send him back early every time and why does my son BEG me to let him stay with me rather than go to his dad's? My son is about to turn 14 and I have an almost 3 year old from another relationship. I'm scared that the court will side with that manipulative POS when I didn't even do anything!!! He filed because he's about to have another kid and has been complaining about child support for the last 14 years. He doesn't care about my son's well being. He only does whatever he can to abuse me since he can't physically do so anymore...he has always used my son against me and has put a wedge between us.
I called the police last weekend because I found a stolen GUN in my son's room while I was looking for my cell phone that he stole. So DCF got involved and said that my son's issues are 100% ME and they won't let me make my son get help!!!
If the state of VT awards this abusive POS a year restraining order against me, my kids will be separated and I may never see my oldest again and I didn't even do anything besides try to get the kid help!!!
I have a lawyer and have already spent almost $1000 in the last week and I'm a stay at home mom and small business owner.
I have never been in any trouble before and I'm beside myself. I'm scared to death which was exactly what my ex wanted. Fingers crossed that a judge will be able to see that my ex did this in retaliation and because he didn't want to try to get custody the "right" way. I'm feeling so helpless and hopeless and distraught. Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated.
I'm a living example of this. It has caused my several issues in my life and has made employment with law enforcement virtually impossible, which is the career I wish to pursue! However, I have forgiven her, and we are now much happier than before in regards to our relationship. That being said, false accusations are very real, and often times, my case included, you truly are guilty until proven innocent!
There seems to be a high amount of domestic violence calls in Mecklenburg County, NC (one website listed over 36,000 last year) with the population approximately 991,000, which is 3.6% of the population. Take out young children and some of the elderly, then this percentage increases. This is too high of a number and the FBI or some agency should investigate. The courts, judges, law enforcement are making profits from this while the actual victim suffers. The Greg Hardy story has become and media circus. The victims and the witnesses were giving no consideration by the release of all the 911 tapes. One witness said that they were afraid and lived in the building practically giving that person's identity away. These officers are not trained in the psychology of domestic violence and are not held accountable for their missteps and have the victims arrested. Officers will arrest a person without talking to the person, or writing a detailed police report, which can be shown in the Hardy case as well. A warrant should not be taken out against the victim with 2 short sentences when the victim endured 3 hours of abuse by the accuser. The law no longer protects women, because the false accusers have learned how to manipulate the law to their advantage while they can continue to abuse other women and get away with it.
upto I looked at the bank draft ov $8313 , I didnt believe ...that...my friends brother woz like realey bringing in money in there spare time at there computar. . there friend brother haz done this less than fourteen months and resently paid for the morgage on there cottage and got a brand new Mazda MX-5 . hop over to this website
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FAMILY COURT IS DESTROYING FAMILES
As a outside party watching a woman degrade, falsify stories, false accusations of domestic abuse without merit for the sake of gaining custody just for the child support and revenge, I 100% agree that the system needs to change and start treating both parties with equal respect and listen to facts and look at the facts. In addition, all women who falsely claim domestic abuse should be treated as a criminal because their false accusations in my opinion are consider obstruction of justice. Although the way things are judged greatly effect the innocent father's negatively the persons who are really suffering are the ones these courts are claiming to be looking out....the children. How is stripping away a good innocent father from their lives in their best interests.
In simple terms domestic violence is about abuse, which is not exclusively perpetrated by men. Abuse is a "behavior" that I've seen employed by women. However, I've known a few women that psychologically abuse their husbands with name-calling and yelling for nothing, abuse their children with their constant Drill Sergeant screaming orders, lie to present themselves as victims, create explosive situations to call the cops with the sole intention of "building a case" against their husband, and brainwash their children against their dad. All the while, they keep going to church pretending to be virtuous and devoutly religious, showing an innocent-looking picture of themselves to the world while continually sharing invented "stories" of abuse at home to inspire pity and make others believe everything she says. And people start giving her advice (on how to "get" him using the cops and the court system) because they Stupidly Believe in only her side of the story but get blind-sided by ignoring the man' side. This type of vindictive liar is a devil disguised in sheep's clothes. This False Allegations Campaign has been needed for a long time to stop these manipulative liars and place them in jail for bringing false complaints into the court system, and ruining the lives of their spouses and of their innocent children. Their motivation? Greed for money or vengeance, or both. As someone else said in their signed petition, everyone in this country is innocent until proven guilty, and laws should FIRST investigate the accuser's allegations to find strong Evidence instead of throwing men in jail without due process and only based on the woman's testimony. These liars need to be stopped by laws that do not vilify the other side immediately in a jerk reaction. And male's defense lawyers should have the duty to dig real deep and find the truth about the women's so-called allegations instead of giving up so fast on falsely accused men. No one thinks about it but: courts are giving custody of kids to manipulative liars who "play" with a broken court system, how do you think those kids will turn out learning from a liar to play victim to get what they want? That's a social burden that our society doesn't need either.
In simple terms domestic violence is about abuse, which is not exclusively perpetrated by men. Abuse is a "behavior" that I've seen employed by women. However, I've known a few women that psychologically abuse their husbands with name-calling and yelling for nothing, abuse their children with their constant Drill Sergeant screaming orders, lie to present themselves as victims, create explosive situations to call the cops with the sole intention of "building a case" against their husband, and brainwash their children against their dad. All the while, they keep going to church pretending to be virtuous and devoutly religious, showing an innocent-looking picture of themselves to the world while continually sharing invented "stories" of abuse at home to inspire pity and make others believe everything she says. And people start giving her advice (on how to "get" him using the cops and the court system) because they Stupidly Believe in only her side of the story but get blind-sided by ignoring the man' side. This type of vindictive liar is a devil disguised in sheep's clothes. This False Allegations Campaign has been needed for a long time to stop these manipulative liars and place them in jail for bringing false complaints into the court system, and ruining the lives of their spouses and of their innocent children. Their motivation? Greed for money or vengeance, or both. As someone else said in their signed petition, everyone in this country is innocent until proven guilty, and laws should FIRST investigate the accuser's allegations to find strong Evidence instead of throwing men in jail without due process and only based on the woman's testimony. These liars need to be stopped by laws that do not vilify the other side immediately in a jerk reaction. And male's defense lawyers should have the duty to dig real deep and find the truth about the women's so-called allegations instead of giving up so fast on falsely accused men. No one thinks about it but: courts are giving custody of kids to manipulative liars who "play" with a broken court system, how do you think those kids will turn out learning from a liar to play victim to get what they want? That's a social burden that our society doesn't need either.
The huge problem with the court system and law enforcement officers is that they always go by stereotypes that Only men are capable of abusing others. In fact, I've seen women insult their boyfriends/husbands and calling them names. If they have done so in public, who can say that what happens in private is not worse? Nowadays women are using laws intended to protect victims of real abuse to "get rid" of their husbands portraying them as the abuser and them as a victim. It's sickening how women play victim and the system do not "investigate" the truth of their accounts. The court system should investigate the victim as much as the accused: the law says that we are all innocent until PROVEN guilty.
I was accused of domestic violence by my spouse on month after we were married. She just came into the country three months before on a fiancee visa. She wanted a change of status green card and didn't want to stay with me so she accused me of rape after we have been together for eight years and I took care of her all that time in the Dominican republic. I told her I wanted a divorce two days later she call 911 and said I raped her to get her domestic violence visa and later her green card, public assistance,. and a place to live on tax dollars.. Later bring her kids. and her family over.

I fully support this or will never stop. My life is ruin now I struggling to get by.
Being a personal victim of this 3 times I fully support this.
Being a personal victim of this 3 times I fully support this.
My son's ex-girlfriend has done this to him many times over the course of several years. Not only is it unfair and unjust, it is very scary to know a man can go to jail any time a woman gets mad at him for any reason. Please, fix this problem!
There is no patriarchy, don't believe the hype.
I have 3 sons, 2 of them were victims of false allegations of DV during divorce and/or custody disputes. The accusers make false allegations without a shred of evidence to back up the claim in order to gain the upper hand in family law courts. It needs to stop !!!
The era (or error!) of one-sided 'social-justice' has got to be brought to and end!
guilty until proven innocent is an injustice to all men that are innocent victims.
I'm a lawyer and my ex-wife and her self-proclaimed "Sons of Anarchy" type boyfriend that she had cheated on me with throughout our marriage had concocted a PFA scheme to have me jailed and extricated from my children's lives...all because they knew that a man cannot defend a PFA action...and that alleging a subsequent violation would have me thrown into county jail. The whole process is designed to emotionally and financially exhaust a party without their even having a chance for a fair fight. In the end, I haven't seen my children for over a year (because they believe that I wouldn't have been jailed if not true) and the District Attorney won't even typically consider filing charges against anyone for falsifying an indirect criminal complaint.
The whole process needs to be re-evaluated.
I am 24yr male and I was Accused of Strangling for 5 mins!!!!!! !!!and beating a domestic partner this girl has scoliosis and is very tiny 5f-1in (assume)
found out she was taking my car to see someone else instead of work so i said get out of my residence. She did leave! but two weeks later.... non stop calls and hounding messages with photos of preg test! that others had posted online from 4 years ago
At court judge was female prosicuter,judge and even my laywer were all female and my lawyer (CAL)gave nothing about the truth i had texts of harrasment with the photos of her "fake repost preg test both her sent via facebook and a whitness who i was on the phone with at the time i found out what she was doing with the car with my only name hmm? waits two weeks to file charges,(best of them all ) and says the dog that i owned1 year before i even knew her exiestence, that i stole from her O.o the prince george officer of VA did NOT even take me ino booking or holding not even a car ride just said "we gota do it"none the less judge looks at her and says (looking at my size to hers) and says thers is no way that was possible (wow )
but she still charges me with domestic violence probation, batters programs CCC was my choice and all they have done is find a way to carry on your 24 week class course 65 first fee 20 every class! and we all know gota pay the probation officer in every way too he likes to make the time on probation "hell" you need to seek help pushing into your personal business and making just even more struggling for you.
i understand that there are some of you guys hat have had worse than me
for someone who really did NOT commit this act
i turned 24 in nov 2014 so far i cant hunt protect my family or even have the option to even look at a fire arm and forget about your rep that girl slung my name and my family to the ground
im still on probation and they continue to make my time in the court system even longer
when i already have lost from this my first apartment that i got on my own my licens was suspended i had to give my soul for the fines they gave they took my welding job i cant travel i have been working at odd jobs cooking ect making nothing but im still alive giving my family everything....and mind you that day in court she lied and ruined my hard work that i built to live for left free and is now in another state and is free to tell her tramatizing story.

~ michael ~

p.s i am sorry for the misspelling stayed up all night trying to find a way for some one to help cut this knot that keeps me in my dog house
i fear and mistrust anyone involved with this case for the plain smack in your face "i can do what i want to you bec im a judge...but i have no idea who are so im just going to accept these very harsh punishments to someone who will never have a complete constitutional rightfull lif
I was charged falsely for also trying to leave a girlfriend... It's guilty until proven innocent if a man is charged with domestic abuse.. Even my lawyer said a fair trial in this situation is unobtainable.
My ex girlfriend could not take the fact that i wanted to break up with her one night. I had been drinking and i told her i wanted to leave. As i was putting on my shoes she ranup to me pushing and slapping saying "NO I WONT LET U LEAVE ME!" She was holding me against my will and i didnt know what to do. I slapped her twice on the face an left. She then called the cops saying i punched he multiple time and strangled her. I was arrested for aggrovated domestic assault and contributing to a minor. I then spent a week in jail and got bailed out. I now await court, looking at possible prison time or a Minimal 6 months in jail. All because she is making a mountain out of an ant hill.
I know that love makes you do things that sometimes you regrets, this is my "4" time I see my self in this situation, My wife just we disagreed in a decision, she just goes out call the police, and out I go. Lost of respect, money, friends, it hurts my real loved ones. Lest make really effective law. I hate when I hear of a "man" that hits a woman, and this law doesn't help her anyways.
A friend of mine is going through this right now. He is facing a lot of false charges and could really use support from anyone who has experience with these matters.
I know this himand he is not who this woman is claiming he is. I would die for This man and there is nothing I can do to help. I'm asking if there is anyone out there that would take a moment to hear his story. All I ask is for your time, help and opinion.

With upmost sincerity,
Timothy Jones
i am a victim of this lie. i was accused of domestic violence when i broke up with my girlfriend. this happened in 2010. she called the cops because i was breaking up with her and wanted to leave. they threw me in jail and dragged me through the court system. costing me thousands of dollars and now i have this on my record. just for breaking up with her. its ridiculous. i think this is a money scam. because it sure isn't justice.
Used as a sword not a shield.
Taking the low road, may be easier, but perpetuates circumstantial injustice
Ex parte orders and Department of Children Services processes are both unconstitutional.
I was falsely accused of do in 2010 and had everything taken away from me. I do have joint custody of my two kids but they are used as bribes and collateral. I have to pay $1200.00 a month in child support and I don't make alot of money. I went thru 29 weeks of anger management and a year of probation because my ex cheated on me and didn't want to take responsibility for her actions. Wanted to be the victim.
I have recently been falsely accused ot domestic violence. This article seems to speak directly to me. The woman who shall not be named accused me of this heinous act as she was suspicious of me leaving her. I had been discussing with several friends about the fact that I was going to leave. However, I foolishly stuck around because she could not afford the apartment herself. I wish I would have left earlier before she escalated her erratic behavior, unfortunately she is mentally ill ( Bi-Polar disorder) so I could not accurately predict how she would act from moment to moment. I am unable to afford an attorney all of my material belongings are in her apartment and I am forced to beg a friend to sleep on their living room floor as I try to sort this out. Innocent people get accused and wrongly convicted too often. I am proof, all you can do is hold back the tears, raise your chin high and move forward.
Due to my own recent experience, I have noticed that judges are now becoming bias when it comes to domestic abuse disputes. When a woman lies about being abused, the judge and the whole court system seems to automatically take her side. At that point I felt I couldn't even tell what actually happened because the judge had already made up his mind. I was always under the impression that when you are accused of a crime, you are innocent until proven guilty. This does not seem to be the case anymore in domestic dispute charges where the woman straight up lies about what happened. Don't get me wrong, I know that plenty of women are actually abused by their boyfriends or husbands; which is sick and wrong; however, that is not always the case. Especially when dealing with a pathological lying, drug addicted ex-girlfriend who will say anything in order to get exactly what she wants. In these particular cases, there is a flaw that needs to be fixed in the justice system. One lie in the court room regarding the domestic dispute can cripple the guys whole life. I am now learning this through personal experience and I hope this changes in the future.
Monmouth County family court are bias against men and do not see the web of lies my ex wife tells along with the mental abuse she is causing both my daughters it's a disgrace. This battle has been going on for years. She has also accused me of fLse domestic violence where I was facing 10 years. The judges wanted to hang me all on account of her fabricated story. I took it to trial and thank God for the jury, evidence did not add up
I was a victim of false domestic abuse by a woman who used me to get a green card. We were only married for 5 months until the day after she received her green card approval from USCIS. Now I'm stuck with false charges and she is getting her green card, my money, child support and I'm stuck with the shame, guilt and a criminal charge. The sad part is that she claimed I pushed her. There were no marks or evidence of abuse what so ever. NOT FAIR I'M BEING TREATED LIKE A CRIMINAL FOR SOMETHING I DID NOT DO. Fairfax Virgina.
My son is going thru this right now. They have added other charges too. His girlfriend has told the DA she wants the charges dropped but they will not do it. The worst thing is that they are bringing the children into it & threatening their mother to take the children away if she doesn't cooperate with the DA. They have already sent DHS to the school & their home. And they are attacking my son saying he is a bad parent which is not true. He's never ever harmed his kids or the girlfriend. What do you do? Its a nightmare!
How my partner has been treated without evidence, without cause, and the harm caused by the courts to his daughter for his ex's manipulations is unconscionable. Men are targeted because of their gender alone whereas women are presumed innocent because of theirs. The institutional bias must end.
Going through this with my son now his life is ruined by a girl who lied I am spending all my money to show she not being truthful having been abused I know the power the court gives her and constitutional rights for my son are none he is guilty before court this is not how our founding fathers ment it to be
My boyfriend was falsely accused by his soon to be ex-wife. She also lied in her statements & was actually the one who abused him which is clear in his mug shot!! He had to take a plea bargain or he faced up to 5 years in jail for a crime he did NOT commit!! She is also keeping their young son away from him!! The lying must stop!! Just because you're a "woman scorned" or didn't get your way doesn't mean you should have the right to put a man in jail!!! I want to start a campaign to have his probation dropped or force her to take a polygraph to prove she committed perjury!! This injustice MUST stop! #justice4jon
My ex used her first dropped/perjured TPO as the basis for another new one! Stop the abuse against innocent fathers.
My husband is having the same issues with his ex lying in Virginia.
My fiancÚ is falsely accused of domestic violence due to a woman who is forcing a relationship out of him so she being conniving, dishonorable, and vindictive towards him. He has a woman judge and there is being a bias towards it due to the accusations and her being woman. There is no evidence or proof he did anything. It's just the so called "victims" word against the accuser . It is highly unfair and the courts need to go by facts and reason instead of words and accusations. Men are not the only dangerous human beings out here , women contain power too and many take advantage of their powers by crying wolf. There must be a change of act.
I believe its true; "that person who needed an order of protection ,it could not have protected anyhow , by the time the police get there it's too late." These Narcistic OP loving fools are manipulating peoples lives over and over again. It's a shame that Peoria County Circuit Court in IL would probably be the best place to proove that Letterman joke.
I believe its true; "that person who needed an order of protection ,it could not have protected anyhow , by the time the police get there it's too late." These Narcistic OP loving fools are manipulating peoples lives over and over again. It's a shame that Peoria County Circuit Court in IL would probably be the best place to proove that Letterman joke.
I was sexually abused at the age of 16 by a 24 year old lady.It was my first time so i liked it. we continued and i loved it. she ended up having twins by me. i was 17 she was 25. of course my mom didn't approve, so she fled town moved away. after having the bays a year went by she needed a place to live.my parents where okey with it if they were mine, they were so we reunited i was 18 she was 26. man i was head over hills didn't see the signs. well she was violent, name calling, controlling, you name it she did it. well i work hard three long year along with the physical, mental, and emotional stress. she didn't have to work i took care of it all. but she calmed i was the abuser i was doing so wrong i took care of her, her two boys from another guy whom she abused and got him jail time as well and twins and my Jr. I had to leave before it got more out of hand i left had no choice, either dead or jail had no help so i got on a bus and left. she calm i abused her an all i ever wanted was to take care of her and my kids, because my dad wasn't around for me. Now I see why. she even went to a abusive home shelter like she the victim. she could have stayed in the house but she abusing the system, well now the dfax people call me telling me she starting trouble there and wanted to know if i wanted my kids of course i do. Lord knows i do. ever dog has there day. Some one Please help men like me I'm 22 now and she 30. i got to do something with my life to be there for my boys so this don't happen to them. lets stop this madness. im hereto tell my story it was short and didnt involve much detail but trust me other men are dead or in jail and wont get tell a peice of theirs. I stand today to fight tomorrow with all the abused men men of america. Thank you

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